Category: Following Your Passion

Lately, I’ve found that far too many of the people I talk to have been telling me they feel stuck. They’re overwhelmed by the economy, discouraged by the job market, or trying to grow a business without any traction.

I have to say, it’s tough to hear. It sounds an awful lot like defeatism, which never does anyone any good.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not in denial! Nobody’s operating at “business as usual“ and seeing the same results these days. If you’re having a tougher time than usual, you’re certainly not alone.

But the way I see it, that’s all the more reason to make a shift and evaluate your current situation. One of the key components to have in place is structure.

Without structure, you’re building a house of cards. One small gust – bad news, a missed opportunity, a tough day – and the whole thing collapses.

Whether you’re job hunting or running a business, structure isn’t optional. It’s the foundation that holds it all together, creating and conveying the kind of confidence that attracts opportunities.

If you’re in a career transition, structure means having a consistent schedule, a straightforward process, and real accountability. Otherwise, it’s too easy to spiral into self-doubt or sit in front of your computer all day “researching” and calling it progress.

If you’re trying to grow your coaching business, winging it won’t work anymore (even if it did in the past). You need a plan: Consistent outreach, clear offers, and systems to stay focused.

Think like a seasoned architect or contractor: Start with the blueprint. Know what you’re building and why. Then, follow a process that’s organized, efficient, and rooted in your goals. That’s how you create something solid that can weather a storm.

It doesn’t have to be perfect. But you need something concrete – a plan, a schedule, an edifice to shelter and support you.

If structure is missing for you, it’s time to put it in place. Remember, you don’t have to do it alone.

You’ve probably heard that mindset can make or break you, but it’s really just about how you frame what you’re seeing.

This has been a theme in recent coaching sessions, so I wanted to break it down.

Think of those old black and white prints: Two people can look at the same image and see something completely different (A candlestick or two faces? A rabbit or a duck?).

One of my clients told me she hates selling; it feels manipulative and icky to her. But that’s just one way of seeing it. As a business owner, she needs buyers.

I see selling as a service. If I can help someone, it’s my job to speak up. When they hesitate, I ask questions and dig deeper – not to push, but to support.

Another client felt like a failure because his career hadn’t followed a traditional path. But his perspective was off. He’d launched and succeeded in multiple ventures.

From where I stood, he was already successful. As a coach, I could see that he was just pausing before his next big move.

In both cases, I helped my clients reframe how they saw things, and that shift set them up for their next phase of success.

It’s not Polyanna thinking or toxic positivity. It’s truly looking at it from a different angle.

You have to learn how to be on your own side. If you can’t, find someone who can help. Maybe that’s a coach like me, or maybe it’s a trusted friend. The point is, having a perspective doesn’t mean it’s accurate.

If your thinking leaves you stuck, spiraling, or playing small, it’s probably time to reframe. Sometimes we’re too close to the situation to see clearly. You need someone who can look at the same picture and point out the butterfly you’re convinced is just an apple core.

Reframing your perspective matters, and it can change everything.

One of the biggest mistakes you can make in your career, business, or life might not be what you think it is.

Most people never get what they want because they don’t ask.

I can’t even begin to tell you how often this comes up for me, but I will tell you a quick story that illustrates the power of the ask.

I often speak at events and conferences, and sometimes I pull a significant speaker’s fee. But, as you may know, professional speakers frequently agree to speak for free because we know how to create money-making opportunities from the stage. Every gig offers a chance to raise your visibility, expand your network, attract more leads, and sell your services.

But when considering an upcoming conference in Las Vegas, I decided not to risk leaving money on the table. (It is Vegas, after all!) The materials didn’t mention anything about paying speakers, so I took it upon myself to make the ask – for my full speaking fee!

It turns out that the organizers, in fact, did not have any plans to pay speakers nor did they have a budget set aside to do so.

But you know what? They agreed to pay me anyway!

If I hadn’t asked, I wouldn’t be getting my fee, and they wouldn’t have even covered my expenses.

It’s as simple as that.

Whether it’s about negotiating your salary, making a sale, gathering the information required to close a deal, or getting the help you need to take your business to the next level, nothing will take you further than the power of the ask.

The worst someone can say is “No.” But the best move you can make is assuming they will say YES.

Going into any negotiation, always be prepared to ask for what you want. Go in with confidence and be willing to walk away.

What do you want? When are you going to ask? Go for it!

You may remember my note a few weeks ago about the Power of Joy & how it can serve as a survival tactic in difficult times.

The headlines are still teeming with uncertainty and a whole lot of “WTF,” so I hope you’ve taken my advice to find pleasure in the things you CAN control, and that you’re doing what you can to create more of it.

As for me, I’ve been using my time outside of work to do more of what I enjoy by using my favorite hobby as a means to endure, driven by the momentum it creates.

This isn’t about opting out (or ignoring what’s important) but about opting IN to what helps me show up as the best version of myself, so I can keep fighting the good fight.

What, exactly, have I been up to? Auditioning for community theater! It’s something I do occasionally, revisiting my past career as a theater professional. It’s been such a joy!

But you know me. Even in the midst of a good time, I’ll look for the lessons, too, so I can share with you what I’ve learned.

Here are my takeaways that you can put into practice right away.

1. Be prepared

Whether it’s a job interview, podcast appearance, or wedding toast, take the time to prepare thoroughly and well in advance. Practice ahead, gather what you need, and anticipate anything that might go wrong.
Show up ready and equipped to give it your best shot. Once, my accompanist missed the mark—but I was so prepared, it didn’t throw me off. I knew that song so well, I stayed on track no matter what.

2. Assume equality

If you’ve prepared, you can walk in with your shoulders back, knowing you’re just as good as anyone else, as good as you need to be. Allowing yourself to be intimidated never helps. Conveying confidence is key to setting the tone, to being treated with respect, and to creating space for success. (I was an outsider, not from their usual pool of talent, but that was no reason to be intimidated.)

3. Do your research

Don’t show up or walk away without the information you need. Gathering details is the best way to avoid misunderstandings, insecurity, or missed opportunities. Ask questions until you’re primed for your next step. (I left knowing what the next steps were and when they’d be letting people know who was cast or not cast).

4. Be kind

Never make assumptions about who someone is, where they stand in the pecking order, or how they can help you. Instead, simply go out of your way to be kind, encouraging, and generous to everyone you meet. Anyone could be the person interviewing you, offering an opportunity, or making a decision that affects your future. Rudeness, dismissiveness, and haughty behavior backfire more than you know.

I’ll keep you posted on whether or not I get the part. But either way, it brought me joy. I hope you’re also experiencing joy, learning, and growing – no matter what else is happening in the world.