I recently had a powerful conversation with Shiraz Baboo, author of How to Rewrite Reality, on my Friday Focus livestream. (If you’re not following me there yet, you can catch future episodes on LinkedIn or Instagram. He calls himself a reality interventionist, and after hearing what he shared about being addicted to your reality, I can see why.
What Purpose Being Addicted to Your Reality Serves
Here’s the short version:
Most of us are addicted to our reality – even when it’s uncomfortable or even when it’s holding us back – because it gives us something we crave. Even if that seems unthinkable (i.e., “Why would I WANT this mess?”)
I see it all the time in my work with clients. They’re stuck in patterns – under-earning, overworking, chasing impossible standards, feeling “not ready” to make the next move – and what we discover is that those patterns aren’t just habits; they’re serving a purpose. There’s a payoff, even if it’s subconscious.
Shiraz gave the example of a client who complained that he was constantly solving problems. His life and business were overrun with problems. But he also owned it, with pride, as an identity: “I’m an amazing problem-solver.”
The Issue with Being Addicted to Your Reality
The issue? To feel valuable, he had to create problems to solve. That identity gave him a dopamine hit. When he let go of the identity, the problems disappeared . . . but then he got anxious without his daily dose of validation. He was addicted to the reality he’d created, even though he no longer wanted it.
This isn’t just about “problem-solver” types. It shows up in heart-centered professionals, too, particularly when it comes to money.
Some people stay under-earning because, deep down, they believe wealthy people are selfish or unethical. If that’s your belief, you’ll subconsciously make sure you never become one of them. You’ll seek evidence to prove you’re right and get a little dopamine hit every time you find it.
But here’s the thing: Just because a reality feels familiar doesn’t mean it’s true or permanent.
Changing Being Addicted to Your Reality
My philosophy is simple: Your purpose lives in who you already are. Sometimes that purpose is buried under outdated beliefs or old stories about what’s possible. But I’ve coached enough people through big transformations to recognize most of us already know what we want. We’re just afraid to want it out loud.
That’s the work. Not pushing harder. Not ignoring your feelings. But being honest about the identity, story, or belief you’re clinging to, and choosing something different.
You can become addicted to ease, to peace, to fulfillment.
You can rewrite your reality.
If you’re ready to step out of the old script and into something better, I’d love to help you find your “Now What?”
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