Here are the strategies that nine women used to obtain the jobs they wanted. Take a look and see which ones spark an idea for you. If you were to select a few approaches to pursue which would they be? To inject some new energy into your campaign, try adding a strategy that you haven’t used before. Since there is no silver bullet, a combination approach is your best bet.
Inspiration to Follow Your Blueprint
Connecting Two Dreams
Here’s one woman’s account of what it was like to realize that after years of pursuing what she thought she wanted, a new dream was forming. It took some introspection and revisiting of her childhood before clarity came to Diana Abu-Jabar . Diana’s younger self had concluded that meaningful work and having children were mutually exclusive choices and that she could pursue one or the other but not both. In the Now What?® Program, this is what we refer to as “conflicting desires”. The funny thing is that they might not even be opposite desires, but how you interpret them or what you fear can happen that makes them appear opposite, which affects your assumptions about what is possible in your life.
It wasn’t until Diana was in her 40’s that she and her husband decided to become adoptive parents to a baby girl they named Grace. The sharp lines of family vs. career have blurred. “Through Grace, we transcended our old fears and perceptions of ourselves that no longer fit. We discovered that life could be so much bigger than we had imagined.” Reflecting on the changes that have transpired Diana comments, “Life pours into new containers…”
Questions to Consider:
- Are there assumptions you’ve made that can be revisited now?
- What dreams of yours have you been framing as mutually exclusive? What is a new container that can connect them?
There’s No Comparison
by Ginny Kravitz, Deputy Editor
This Is Your Life
I was 30 years old and sitting in a counselor’s office contemplating the next chapter of my life, having recently decided to get divorced. Elaine (the counselor) commented that she had observed it often took about six years post-divorce to be ready for a serious relationship again. While on one level I was at peace and looking forward to a fresh start, on another level I had an overriding feeling that could be summed up in three words: I’m so behind.
Elaine smiled with understanding and offered these reassuring words: This is your life, no one else’s. Right in that moment, I got it. How was I behind? Was someone keeping track? Elaine was right. I could bemoan how my life looked on paper compared to someone else’s at this snapshot in time or I could look at my life with curiosity and wonder. I could respect how it was unfolding as uniquely mine, bumps and all. I chose the latter.
Eyes Straight Ahead
Olympic coaches tell their swimmers to keep their eyes straight ahead. You only lose time if you glance to the left or right to see what swimmers in the other lanes are doing. When your eyes are straight ahead you can focus on making your personal best.
Kelly, a client who coached with me last year, had a significant breakthrough once she realized how much her habit of comparing herself to others was holding her back. Here’s how she describes it:
I believe I finally got rid of the “shoulds” in my thinking, as well as comparing myself to others, and also learned that most decisions I make do not have to be permanent and final. These lessons learned have felt like a giant weight being lifted off my shoulders and I am able to relax and enjoy the process of discovering/developing my purpose and passion each day.
Think of how you love your friends, foibles and all. In fact, some of their vulnerabilities are what make them even more endearing and precious to you. The same holds true when you allow yourself to fall in love with your own life.
A Rich Tapestry
What if there were no such thing as being behind, a late bloomer, or having to play catch up? Opt out of that game and
instead, see your life as a rich tapestry of unique moments, insights gained, scars earned, courageous acts, lessons learned, love given, and extraordinary gifts exchanged. There is no comparison to your life’s tapestry. It is extremely rare and one of a kind.
This Week: For any challenge you are currently experiencing —a downsizing, stressful situation at work, a breakup, illness, or anything else that could be perceived as a setback— see it as a significant part of your life’s tapestry and notice how this colors your outlook.
“I must Create a System, or be enslaved by another Man’s;
I will not Reason and Compare; my business is to Create.”
— William Blake
Recovering From Sudden Unemployment
Are you unemployed? Do you know someone who is? Practical steps and helpful resources for you to consider—post a comment if you have anything to add that can help someone else going through the same challenge.
What business idea might you like to explore?
Here we have three examples of women who started their own businesses. In one case the business idea originated as a simple holiday gift; in another instance the business started as a sideline; the third business involved a more deliberate study of a potential market niche. As Nan Langowitz, associate professor of management and entrepreneurship at Babson College states, “Even in an economic downturn, there’s opportunity for smart entrepreneurs.”
Moms Launching At-Home Businesses
Today’s article discusses the mindset of the growing population of mothers who are home raising children and also running part-time businesses. If the idea of an at-home business appeals to you, begin by simply posing the question that many Moms are now asking: What work can I do from home?