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Do This To Replace Toxic Positivity

By Laura Berman Fortgang on July 7, 2024

I have a confession to make: I’m not a big fan of positive thinking.

People often find this surprising because — after all — the self-help industry is rife with coaches who promote the power of positive thinking.

Maybe it’s the New Yorker in me, but expecting things to go well just because you’ve decided to be happy and hopeful — well, it doesn’t quite cut it. Call me cynical, but believing optimism will work magic is simply too airy fairy for my sensibilities.

For example, let’s say you feel like you’re not good enough to land your dream job and won’t have enough money to pay your mortgage within the next few months unless you get hired.

Positive thinking enthusiasts will consider your situation and suggest you start saying affirmations.

I AM good enough! I am a millionaire money magnet!

I get it; the idea is to reprogram your thinking to believe everything will work out in your favor. Don’t get me wrong, replacing negative self-talk with a more positive outlook can boost your motivation and confidence. A shift in your perspective can open your eyes to opportunities.

But, let’s face it – positive thinking can also keep you stuck in little more than delusion. It doesn’t necessarily change the actions you’ll take.

In the real world, I prefer to place my bets on a more practical and actionable approach: productive thinking.

Turning a negative thought into a positive one won’t necessarily get you where you want to go. Here’s what I mean —

Let’s say you think you’re too old to pivot onto a new career path. Chanting “I am young and vibrant!” isn’t likely to take you very far anytime soon.

Instead, ask yourself if going around insisting you’re too old to pivot will help produce the outcome you want. No, of course not.

Do This To Replace Toxic Positivity by Laura Berman FortgangNext ask: Is it probable that you’ll run up against ageism? Go ahead and face your fears and admit that you think “yes.”

Then ask: Is it POSSIBLE that you’ll be the one to beat the odds and breakthrough? The honest answer is “yes.” Isn’t that interesting? Admitting you very well may not be too old IS the truth.

Productive thinking is about living in possibilities — not pulling the wool over your eyes and getting caught up in toxic positivity. Instead of rejecting negative emotions and deluding yourself with unrealistic thoughts with no consideration for circumstances, consider what’s possible.

It’s not productive to stay stuck in the problem. Instead, look for options and opportunities. Productive thinking allows for taking action.

When you think you’re not good enough, you collect evidence that you’re not good enough. Positive thinking asks you to toss that evidence aside with no proof.
Meanwhile, productive thinking seeks a different kind of evidence. What actions make “it” more possible? Do you want the job or to succeed in your business? Keep taking the actions that open up possibilities. Learn the skill. Revamp your resume. Launch the podcast. Call the prospect. The more action you take, the more possible your goals and dreams become.

Lacking confidence in a particular area? Start your productive thinking journey this month.

Filed Under: Acknowledgements, Career Burnout, career satisfaction, Following Your Passion, Global Impact, Inspiration to Follow Your Blueprint, Inspirational Quotes, Job Change, Job Satisfaction, Lessons Learned, Life Goals, Life Lessons, Motivational Quotes, Now What? Facilitator Grads, Now What? Newsletter Articles, Now What? Q & A, Now What?® Program Events, Personality Development, Quotes to Live By, Reinventing Yourself, Taking Action Tagged With: Career Change, Career coach, Career Coaching, career path, career reinvention, career transition, Career transitions, Change, Clarity, coaching, entrepreneurs, Following your passion, Laura Berman Fortgang, life coach, life story, Now What Coaching, Now What Program, Now What?® Program, Opportunity, passion, take action, tips, transitionLeave a Comment

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