I have a confession to make: I’m not a big fan of positive thinking.
People often find this surprising because — after all — the self-help industry is rife with coaches who promote the power of positive thinking.
Maybe it’s the New Yorker in me, but expecting things to go well just because you’ve decided to be happy and hopeful — well, it doesn’t quite cut it. Call me cynical, but believing optimism will work magic is simply too airy fairy for my sensibilities.
For example, let’s say you feel like you’re not good enough to land your dream job and won’t have enough money to pay your mortgage within the next few months unless you get hired.
Positive thinking enthusiasts will consider your situation and suggest you start saying affirmations.
I AM good enough! I am a millionaire money magnet!
I get it; the idea is to reprogram your thinking to believe everything will work out in your favor. Don’t get me wrong, replacing negative self-talk with a more positive outlook can boost your motivation and confidence. A shift in your perspective can open your eyes to opportunities.
But, let’s face it – positive thinking can also keep you stuck in little more than delusion. It doesn’t necessarily change the actions you’ll take.
In the real world, I prefer to place my bets on a more practical and actionable approach: productive thinking.
Turning a negative thought into a positive one won’t necessarily get you where you want to go. Here’s what I mean —
Let’s say you think you’re too old to pivot onto a new career path. Chanting “I am young and vibrant!” isn’t likely to take you very far anytime soon.
Instead, ask yourself if going around insisting you’re too old to pivot will help produce the outcome you want. No, of course not.
Next ask: Is it probable that you’ll run up against ageism? Go ahead and face your fears and admit that you think “yes.”
Then ask: Is it POSSIBLE that you’ll be the one to beat the odds and breakthrough? The honest answer is “yes.” Isn’t that interesting? Admitting you very well may not be too old IS the truth.
Productive thinking is about living in possibilities — not pulling the wool over your eyes and getting caught up in toxic positivity. Instead of rejecting negative emotions and deluding yourself with unrealistic thoughts with no consideration for circumstances, consider what’s possible.
It’s not productive to stay stuck in the problem. Instead, look for options and opportunities. Productive thinking allows for taking action.
When you think you’re not good enough, you collect evidence that you’re not good enough. Positive thinking asks you to toss that evidence aside with no proof.
Meanwhile, productive thinking seeks a different kind of evidence. What actions make “it” more possible? Do you want the job or to succeed in your business? Keep taking the actions that open up possibilities. Learn the skill. Revamp your resume. Launch the podcast. Call the prospect. The more action you take, the more possible your goals and dreams become.
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