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new direction

Your To-Do List Is Lying To You

By Laura Berman Fortgang on July 12, 2026

The Two-List Problem: Why Your To-Do List Is Lying to You

Take out your to-do list right now. Whether it’s on your phone, in an app, on a sticky note — go grab it and take a look.

Now tell me: Is “reorder printer ink” sitting on the same list as “launch the new offer?” Is “schedule the dentist” hanging out right next to “have the hard conversation with my boss?” Is “reply to Karen” cozied up next to “finish the strategic plan?”

If yes, welcome to the club. And also — congratulations — your to-do list is quietly sabotaging you. I want to show you why, and what to do about it.

What Most People Get Wrong About Productivity

Most people think that if they can just get more on their list done, they’ll finally feel accomplished. So they hunt for productivity apps, time-blocking systems, morning routines, the perfect planner — all in service of doing more of what’s already on the list.

Here’s the problem: Your list is lying to you.

Everything on it looks equal. Every item has the same little checkbox next to it. And your brain, which loves the dopamine hit of crossing things off, will happily attack the easiest thing first. Reorder the printer ink. Check. Reply to the email. Check. Schedule the thing. Check, check, check.

Meanwhile, the one item that would actually move your business (or your life) forward is still sitting there at 5 PM, untouched. You feel strangely busy, but unaccomplished, because you were.

This is what I call the Two-List Problem. And once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

The Two-List Problem: Why Your To-Do List Is Lying to You by Laura Berman Fortgang

The Fix: Two Lists, Not One

List A is your Growth List. Three to five items maximum — because honestly, we can’t do more than three to five things and do them well. These are the things that actually move your life, career, or business forward. The strategic call. The hard conversation. The creative work. The new offer. The proposal. The pitch. If you did nothing else that week but these, you’d still have moved the needle on your world.

List B is your Maintenance List. All the busy work — the admin, the chores, the email, the errands, the reorder-printer-ink items. These things matter to keep the machine running, but they don’t grow anything. They just prevent decay.

Here’s the rule:
Don’t touch List B until you’ve made real progress on List A.
Not zero progress. Real progress.

Most people flip this. They think, “If I just clear the small stuff, I’ll have time and headspace for the big stuff.” No, you won’t. The small stuff expands like a kitten pulling on a ball of yarn; it just keeps coming and coming and coming. And you drown in maintenance, get to 5 PM, and think, “Well, I got a lot done.” But did you? Did the needle move?

Whether you’re a founder running your own show or a leader running a team, the principle is identical. The people who make real progress work on their Growth List first. Everyone else drowns in maintenance and calls it a productive day.

Three Practices to Make It Work

Audit your list.
Go through every item and mark each one G or M — Growth or Maintenance. You will be shocked at how much of what you thought was “important work” is actually just maintenance dressed up in urgent costumes.

Start every day with your Growth List.
Before you open email, before you open Slack, before you touch the stuff that spikes your anxiety,
pick something from your Growth List and give it your first ninety minutes. If you can’t give it ninety, give it your first attention of the day. That’s when your brain is sharpest, and the world is quietest. Whatever you touch first is what actually gets done. Make it something that matters.

Cap the list at three to five items.
If you have twelve items on there, it’s not a Growth List; it’s a wish list. The whole point is forced prioritization. If everything is growth, nothing is. Pick the three to five things that matter most this week and let the rest wait. They’ll be there – I promise.

The Distinction I Want You to Internalize

Being busy and making progress are two different things — in fact, they’re often opposites.

There’s a distinction I love from coaching: Being efficient versus being effective. You can feel very efficient when you got everything done. But were you effective? Did anything actually happen? Did the needle move?

You want to be effective.

The most productive people I know don’t do more than you. They do less, but they do the right less. They’ve made peace with the fact that a lot of what feels urgent is actually just noise wearing a costume. They’ve stopped letting their to-do list run their day and instead started running their to-do list.

Your Homework This Week

Before Sunday night (tonight), do the list audit. Sort every item into Growth or Maintenance. Then take your Growth List — three to five items — and put it somewhere visible where you’ll see it first thing Monday morning.

Then Monday, before you open your email, do one item from that list – just one. Notice how the whole shape of your day changes when you’ve moved the needle before anyone else has had a chance to hand you their agenda.

Because the people building the biggest, boldest, most meaningful work in the world have all figured out the same thing.
They’re not doing more. They’re doing what matters — first.

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Career coach, Career Coaching, entrepreneurs, Laura Berman Fortgang, new direction, Now What Coaching, take action

Waiting isn’t humility; it’s a stall tactic

By Laura Berman Fortgang on July 5, 2026

The Confidence Loop: Why Waiting to Feel Ready Is Keeping You Stuck

What’s the thing you’ve been putting off until you feel ready?

The business you’ve been waiting to launch.
The promotion you’ve been thinking about asking for.
The hard conversation you’ve been rehearsing for months.
The book, the podcast, the pivot, the pitch.

Here’s the follow-up questions:
How’s it working for you?
Are you any closer to feeling ready after this whole year of waiting?
Are you still hoping for that magic moment when something clicks and the confidence finally shows up?

Spoiler Alert: It’s not coming. And I want to explain why.

What Most People Get Wrong About Confidence

Most people think they have to feel ready before they take the action. They believe confidence is a feeling you achieve first, and only then do you launch, ask, post, pitch, or push back.

But that’s backwards.
Confidence isn’t the cause of action. Confidence is the result of action.

You don’t think your way into confidence. You act your way into it.

This is hard whatever camp you’re in. If you’re an entrepreneur, you’re probably waiting to feel ready before you raise your prices, launch the offer, or post the thing on LinkedIn. If you’re in corporate, you’re waiting to feel ready before you talk to your boss about the promotion, speak up in the meeting, or push back on a decision. Different settings, same trap. You’re waiting for a feeling that only shows up after you do the thing you’re waiting to feel ready to do.

Why Waiting Makes It Worse

Here’s the brutal part — waiting actively erodes your confidence. The longer you wait, the more you’re quietly teaching your brain that you can’t, you shouldn’t, you’re not ready. The waiting itself becomes evidence.

Meanwhile, the people you watch flying past you? They’re not more talented. They’re not smarter. They’re not more prepared than you are. They’ve just figured out what you haven’t yet — that confidence is built on the other side of action, not on this side of it.

Think about anything you’re confident about right now. Driving a car. Running a meeting. Having a hard conversation with your teenager. You’re not confident at those things because you sat around until you felt ready. You’re confident because you did them (maybe badly at first) and then less badly, and then with ease.

That’s the loop. Action creates evidence. Evidence creates belief. Belief makes the next action easier.
And the loop keeps spinning, but only if you’re willing to take that first imperfect step to get it started.

The Confidence Loop: Why Waiting to Feel Ready Is Keeping You Stuck

Three Practices to Start the Confidence Loop

Shrink the action. You’re not writing a whole book; you’re writing five hundred words. You’re not running in to demand a promotion; you’re asking your boss for fifteen minutes to talk about your trajectory. You’re not launching the whole big product; you’re writing the sales page first. Make the action smaller. Make it doable. The lower the resistance, the faster you start.

Do it badly on purpose. You just have to get started. You’re not going to be perfect the first time out. The first pitch is going to be awkward. The first draft isn’t going to be written right. It doesn’t matter. Action beats inaction every single time. Let the action inform you, teach you, show you what to fix next time, but do it imperfectly.

Collect the evidence. Most people take the action and then move on without noticing. Don’t. Look at the email you sent. Look at the price you quoted. Look at the meeting you ran. Look at the post you published. You’re building a case file for yourself because the next time you run out of confidence and forget that you’re good at something, you can go back and say, “Hey, I did that.”

The Mindset That Makes Confidence Stick

Here’s what I want you to internalize:
Feeling ready is not a prerequisite for being ready. It’s a reward for already having started.

Total opposite thinking, right?

The most successful people I know don’t feel more confident than you do. They’ve just stopped requiring confidence as a permission slip. They take action while uncertain. They speak up while nervous. They launch while imperfect. The confidence catches up with them.

Waiting to feel ready isn’t humility, wisdom, or strategy. It’s a stall tactic dressed up as something respectable, but I don’t respect it. It’s costing you the life and the business you actually want.

Your Challenge Today

Forget the whole week. Here’s your homework today: Take something you’ve been waiting to feel ready to do, and do it.
Send the email. Make the call. Ask for the thing. Write the paragraph. Just do it.

Then notice what happens — not externally, but inside you. Because the confidence you’ve been waiting for has been on the other side of that one small action the entire time.

The people doing the boldest, most courageous work in the world aren’t more confident than you.
They just stopped waiting and started.

And starting today, so do you.

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Career coach, Career Coaching, Clarity, entrepreneurs, Laura Berman Fortgang, life coach, new direction, Now What Coaching, Opportunity, take action

Strategic Selfishness: Why Protecting Your Time Is the Most Powerful Move You’re Not Making

By Laura Berman Fortgang on June 7, 2026

When was the last time you said yes to something when every cell in your body was screaming no — and then spent days quietly resenting it?

If that question hit a nerve, you’re not alone. Today I want to make a case that’s going to make some of you uncomfortable: the most successful people you know are also, by most people’s definition, a little bit selfish. And you need to be too.

The Difference That Changes Everything

There’s a critical distinction we need to make right up front.
Selfish means taking at other people’s expense.
Self-prioritizing means protecting what allows you to give your best.
Those are not the same thing, but most of us have been taught to treat them as identical.

We’ve been told that selfish is the worst thing you can be, especially if you’re in a leadership role, a family role, or a helping role. But here’s what I notice: Every Fortune 500 CEO has a calendar guarded like Fort Knox. Nobody calls them selfish; they call them successful.

Warren Buffett said it best: “The difference between successful people and very successful people is that very successful people say no to almost everything.” Totally counterintuitive — and totally true.

The question isn’t whether you’re allowed to protect your time.
The question is whether you’re willing to stop apologizing for it.
You are not a vending machine for other people’s convenience.

Strategic Selfishness: Why Protecting Your Time Is the Most Powerful Move You're Not Making by Laura Berman FortgangThe Three Taxes You’re Paying Right Now

Chronic yes-saying carries three hidden costs that most people never see until they’re depleted.

The Energy Tax.
Every yes you didn’t mean is energy you can’t get back. You don’t just lose the hour of the meeting. You lose the anticipation time, the recovery time, and the mental real estate it occupies in your head.

The Opportunity Tax.
Every yes is a no to something else. The book you didn’t finish. The workout you didn’t do. The conversation with your kid that you didn’t have. People don’t see what you give up to say yes to them, but you do, and it adds up.

The Resentment Tax.
This is the silent killer. Chronic yes-saying doesn’t make people like you more. It makes you quietly resent them. That resentment leaks out and poisons every relationship it touches — your marriage, your team, your friendships. The very relationships you’re trying to protect by saying yes are the ones most damaged by it.

Three Scripts to Put in Your Back Pocket

Knowing why you need to say no is one thing. Knowing what to actually say is another. Here are three phrases you can use this week.

For the meeting that should be an email: “I want to make sure I’m giving this the focus it deserves. Can you send me the key points in an email, and I’ll respond with a thoughtful answer?“

For the favor you don’t have capacity for: “I’d love to help, but I’m protecting my bandwidth this quarter for the commitments I’ve already made.”

For the boss or client who feels impossible to refuse: “I want to do this well. To take this on, I’d need to deprioritize X. Which would you like me to focus on?” This one is powerful because it puts the decision back where it belongs — with them.

The key with all of these is no apologies, no over-explaining, and no leaving the door open a crack. Just a clean, kind no. A wishy-washy maybe is cruelty disguised as politeness.

The Mindset Shift That Makes It Stick

Before you can use any of this, you need to internalize something:
You are not responsible for managing other people’s disappointment.

The people who truly respect you will respect your no. The ones who don’t were never respecting you in the first place; they were just enjoying your compliance. Let them be annoyed.

If you feel guilty when you start doing this? Good.
Feeling guilty doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. It means you did something new. Congratulations!

Your Homework This Week

Say no to one thing. Just one. Something you’d normally say yes to out of habit, guilt, or fear of disappointing somebody. Notice what happens — both inside you and in the relationship.

Because the people doing the biggest work in the world, building the biggest companies, raising the healthiest families, making the deepest impact — they’ve all made peace with the same truth. They can’t be everything to everyone. And neither can you.

Protecting your time isn’t selfish. It’s the most strategic thing you’ll ever do.

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Career coach, Career Coaching, Clarity, entrepreneurs, Laura Berman Fortgang, life coach, new direction, take action

The Three C’s That Separate Owners from Wishers

By Laura Berman Fortgang on May 31, 2026

Consistency, Commitment, and Courage — The Quiet Engine of Every Business That Lasts

There’s a romantic story we tell about entrepreneurship.
The big idea. The bold pivot. The viral launch. The lightning strike of genius that changes everything.

Consistency, Commitment, and Courage — The Quiet Engine of Every Business That LastsI’ve spent enough time around business owners — the seasoned, the scrappy, and the ones still working a day job while building something on the side — to tell you that story is mostly fiction. The real engine isn’t lightning. It’s three quieter forces working together: consistency, commitment, and courage. None of them is glamorous. All three are non-negotiable. And the people who win are simply the ones who refuse to put any of them down.


Consistency: The Compound Interest of Showing Up

Consistency is the most underrated skill in business. It’s also the one most people quit on first, because it looks like nothing is happening until suddenly, everything is.

If you post once a week for two months and stop because “it didn’t work,” you didn’t run an experiment; you ran a teaser. Algorithms, customers, referral partners, and your own confidence all reward the person who is still there in month nine, month eighteen, month thirty-six. Not because the universe is fair, but because trust is built on predictability. People hire you, buy from you, and refer you because they’ve watched you do the thing repeatedly, the same way, with the same care.

Consistency doesn’t mean perfection; it means a reliable floor. Your worst Tuesday is still a Tuesday someone can count on. The newsletter still goes out. The invoices still get sent. The client still gets the call back within 24 hours. Pick the three or four behaviors that define your business and make them boring. Make them automatic. The boring stuff is the brand.

A quick gut check: If you disappeared for thirty days, what would your business look like when you came back? If the answer is “gone,” you don’t have a consistency problem; you have a system problem. Build the rhythm before you scale anything else.


Commitment: The Decision You Make Twice

Commitment gets confused with passion, and they aren’t the same thing. Passion is the feeling you had when you started. Commitment is the decision you make on the Tuesday in February when passion has left the building.

Here’s the truth nobody puts on the inspirational mug: Every business owner I respect has wanted to quit. Many of them have wanted to quit this month. What separates them isn’t an absence of doubt; it’s a relationship with their doubt. They’ve decided in advance that wobble doesn’t equal exit.

For the already self-employed: Commitment looks like staying with the boring middle. The part after the launch high and before the breakthrough. The 18-month stretch where the numbers grow slowly, and the work feels invisible. Most people quit here, which is exactly why staying is so valuable.

For the wanna-be self-employed: Commitment looks like building before you’re ready to leave. Real commitment isn’t a dramatic resignation email. It’s the unsexy work of stacking savings, landing your first three clients on nights and weekends, and proving the model before you bet the mortgage on it. The leap is safer when you’ve built the bridge.

A useful question to ask yourself:
What would I do if I knew I couldn’t quit for the next three years?
Whatever that answer is — start doing it now.


Courage: The Tax You Pay to Stay in the Game

Consistency and commitment will carry you a long way, but eventually you’ll hit a wall that requires something different. You’ll need to raise your prices. Fire a client who’s bleeding you dry. Have the hard conversation with a partner. Walk away from work that pays the bills but kills your energy. Say no to a “good” opportunity so you can say yes to a great one.

That’s where courage comes in.

Courage in business is rarely the cinematic kind. It’s not a TEDx Talk or a moonshot. It’s almost always small, private, and uncomfortable. Sending the proposal at the number that makes your stomach flip. Telling the prospect you’re not the right fit. Owning a mistake to a client before they discover it themselves. Investing in the coach, the software, the hire when the receipt feels too big.

Courage doesn’t show up before the action; it shows up during. You don’t feel brave and then move. You move while afraid, and bravery is the name you give it afterward. If you’re waiting to feel ready, you’ll wait forever. Readiness is a story we tell ourselves to delay discomfort.


The Three C’s, Together

Any one of these alone will fail you. Consistency without commitment is a hamster wheel; you’ll show up reliably for the wrong thing. Commitment without courage becomes stubbornness, doubling down when you should pivot. Courage without consistency is a series of bold moves that never compound into anything.

But woven together, they become something formidable.
You show up (consistency).
You stay (commitment).
You do the hard thing when it’s time (courage).
That’s it. That’s the whole playbook. There is no secret hack underneath it.

The good news? None of these require talent; they require choice.
You can choose all three, today, and again tomorrow, and again the day after that.

That’s the work. That’s also the privilege.

Now go run your Monday.

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Clarity, coaching, entrepreneurs, Laura Berman Fortgang, new direction

Discipline: The Muscle You’re Not Using (But Can Start Today)

By Laura Berman Fortgang on April 12, 2026

I’m going to be honest with you. I fell off the wagon.

Last fall, I built a workout habit from absolute zero. Not “I used to work out and got lazy” — I mean nothing. I made the ten-minute deal with myself: all I had to commit to was just ten minutes. Ten minutes turned into twenty. Twenty turned into thirty. Thirty turned into forty. Before long, I was working out five to seven days a week, and it felt incredible. I had done it. I had built the muscle — literally and figuratively.

Then winter came. The cold crept in, the days got shorter, and somewhere between the gray skies and the warm blankets, I lost it. The streak broke. The habit unraveled. I found myself doing exactly what I tell other people not to do, which is waiting to feel like it again.

I’m sharing this because discipline isn’t a destination you arrive at and stay forever. It’s something you build, lose, and build again. And right now, I’m building back. I’m back to making the ten-minute deal with myself, back to starting embarrassingly small, and reminding myself that the version of me who showed up every day last fall? She’s still in here!

If you’ve fallen off something too — a workout routine, a business goal, a creative project — this one’s for you.

When most people hear the word “discipline,” they picture someone waking up at 5 am to hit the gym, turning down junk food without a second thought, or staying clean and sober through sheer willpower. We tend to assume those people were just born that way.

They weren’t. Discipline is a muscle, and like any muscle, you can build it.

First, let’s kill a myth.

Discipline has nothing to do with motivation. Stop searching for the right playlist, the right podcast, or the right inspirational speech. When you’re hunting for motivation, you’re really just trying to change your mood – that’s backwards. Mood follows action, not the other way around. Stop waiting to feel like it. Do the thing, and the feeling will follow. Discipline is a decision — ideally one you make once, though sometimes you have to make it every single day.
​​
Four Ways to Build the Muscle

  1. Schedule it. ​
    It’s not “when I can get to it.” It goes in the calendar, and you treat it like any other commitment. Do the hard thing first.
  2. Start embarrassingly small. ​
    Five pushups count. Seriously. The goal isn’t volume; it’s telling your brain, this is who I am. I’m someone who moves daily. I’m someone who works on their business. You’re building an identity, not just a habit.
  3. Design your environment to support it. ​
    This isn’t about willpower; it’s about removing friction. Don’t keep foods in the house you’re trying to avoid. Put fruit on the counter. Lay out your gym clothes. If you know you won’t drive to a gym, collect what you need, even if it’s used equipment to build one at home. Make the right choice the easy choice.
  4. Track your progress visibly. ​
    Make a chart. Old-school, simple, visible. You won’t want to break the chain, and that instinct is powerful.

When You Just Don’t Feel Like It

  • The 5-4-3-2-1 method (from Mel Robbins)
    Count down from five and physically move your body. Change rooms. Get up. Just move.
  • The 10-minute deal​
    Tell yourself you only have to do it for ten minutes. You can stop when the timer goes off, but odds are your mood will shift and you’ll keep going.
  • Identity anchoring​
    Instead of asking “How do I feel about this?,” ask “What would a disciplined person do?” Then do that.
  • Pre-decide for your future self​
    Pack a healthy lunch the night before. Put a sticky note on your laptop. Set yourself up so future-you doesn’t have to negotiate.
  • Zoom out​
    Ask yourself, Will I regret not doing this? The answer is almost always Yes.

How to Sustain It

Discipline isn’t about perfection; it’s about consistency. Progress over perfection, every time. The real reframe is this: Discipline is choosing your future self over your present self. Not What do I need to do today? but Who do I want to become? A healthy person does this. A writer does that. A strong business owner shows up like this.

Invest in who you’re becoming. Start imperfectly. Just start!

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Change, Clarity, coaching, new direction

You Are Not Your Story — But Your Story Is Running Your Life

By Laura Berman Fortgang on April 5, 2026

Most of us hear the word “storytelling” and think of campfires, children’s books, or maybe a TEDx Talk. But veteran coach and one of my early mentors, Jay Perry, has spent decades thinking about something far more fundamental: the stories that are already running inside you, whether you chose them or not.

Perry calls it the “story sphere,” a term he coined to describe the invisible atmosphere of narratives surrounding us at all times: interior stories, media stories, family stories, political stories. According to Perry, AI estimates there may be as many as a trillion stories operating at any given moment. “Like the atmosphere,” he says, “we don’t necessarily see everything that’s going on, but we know if we didn’t have oxygen and hydrogen and all those things, we couldn’t survive. We don’t survive without story. Story actually is what human is.”

This isn’t a metaphor; it’s neuroscience. Our brains are literally wired to function through story — seeking patterns, confirming what they already believe, and above all, protecting us from perceived threat.

The Squatter Stories

That protective function is where things get complicated. Over the course of our lives, we accumulate what Perry calls “squatter stories,” which are narratives that took up residence in the brain and refuse to leave. Things like I’ll never finish anything; I’m always behind; or Just when things get going, everything falls apart. Many people Perry works with are neurodivergent, and for them these stories often coalesce into a single punishing belief: There’s something wrong with me.

The brain doesn’t mean harm. It’s doing exactly what it was designed to do — protecting you based on patterns it has recognized. But the problem is confirmation bias. “Every time something shows up that confirms that I’m stupid, or whatever that story is,” Perry explains, “the brain digs deeper and deeper into it.” The story becomes identity. It becomes the lens through which you see everything.

Simply telling yourself to “change your story” doesn’t work. As Perry puts it: “Easy conceptually, but to actually do that requires lessening the power of those foundational stories and increasing our narrative intelligence.” Trying to override a deep story with sheer logic, he says, is like bringing a knife to a gunfight.

You Are Not Your Story — But Your Story Is Running Your Life by Laura Berman FortgangThe Intelligence We’ve Been Ignoring

Here’s where Perry’s work gets truly provocative. He distinguishes between two modes of thinking. Logical thinking works on data, and AI does that better than any human ever will. But there’s another kind of thinking, what he calls Narrative Intelligence, that operates on something entirely different: imagination, intuition, emotion, wonder, common sense.

“Narrative intelligence works on no data,” Perry says. “Logic works really well when the future is likely to be like the present and the past.” In a world changing as rapidly as ours, that’s a liability. The people who will navigate what’s ahead are those who can think in story and can imagine outcomes not yet in evidence, hold multiple possibilities at once, and pivot when the plan stops working.

We’ve been rewarded our whole lives for getting the right answer. That rewired us toward the logical, computational mode of thinking. Now that machines are taking over that function, the undervalued skill — narrative intelligence — suddenly becomes essential.

How Fascinating

What do you actually do when a squatter story shows up? Perry was inspired by conductor and author Benjamin Zander, who teaches a deceptively simple practice: When something goes wrong, say “how fascinating,” and mean it fully, physically, emotionally.

It sounds almost too simple, but the point is precise. You can’t fight a foundational story with a cognitive argument, because the story has far more emotional force than any counterargument you can muster. What you can do is interrupt the pattern with enough energy and presence to actually stop the loop. “How fascinating” isn’t just words. It’s a full-bodied shift in stance that says: I see you, story. And I’m curious about you, not imprisoned by you.

Perry calls this approach “playful story catching.” The goal isn’t to eliminate the stories or shame yourself for having them. It’s to notice them, to create distance from them, and remember that you are the author, not the character.

One powerful technique is shifting your narrative perspective. Our brains are conditioned to protect “I.” But if you can catch yourself in an “I story” and reframe it, such as Laura is having trouble with this instead of I am having trouble with this — the brain relaxes its grip. The protective mechanism doesn’t guard “Laura” the same way it guards “I.”

The Power of We

Perhaps the most striking idea Perry offers is the shift from “I stories” to “we stories.” No one has ever done anything entirely alone, yet we insist on framing our lives as solo narratives. When you expand your story to include others — a community, a collaborator, an idea, even a place — possibilities open that the I story simply cannot access. “The I story is chained by that protective mechanism,” Perry says. “When we start thinking in we stories, things become possible that aren’t possible for the I story.”

He built his community, Story Sphere Central, around exactly this principle. For $22 a month, members from Thailand to Europe gather for group coaching, co-working sessions, creative workshops, and a course called Heroes of the Story Sphere — a name Perry chose deliberately. “I think it takes bravery,” he says. “It takes heroism to show up and actually look for the truth about what the stories are.”

Be Open to the Plot Twist

Perry closes with what may be his most powerful invitation. In a study by researcher Angus Fletcher, veterans with PTSD were given access to every conventional healing modality available including massage, meditation, and yoga. Only one person in the group made a full recovery. What set them apart? They had experienced a plot twist.

A plot twist isn’t something you manufacture. It’s something you receive — a bankruptcy, a loss, an unexpected phone call, an idea that comes from nowhere. What you can do is stay open to one. “If we can open our consciousness to seeing the gifts that are given to us,” Perry says, “that’s why it’s so important to have we stories — because that multiplies the number of opportunities we have for plot twists.”

You are swimming in a story sphere right now.
The question is whether you’re authoring the story or being authored by it.


Jay Perry’s community, Story Sphere Central, can be found at StorySphereCentral.com.
This article is a synthesis of an interview conducted on March 27, 2026

Filed Under: Now What? Newsletter Articles Tagged With: Career Coaching, entrepreneurs, Laura Berman Fortgang, new direction, Now What Coaching, take action, transition

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