Now What?® Coaching

from Laura Berman Fortgang

Reinventing Yourself

Every A-List Coach Has This Nailed

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I want to clear something up. This has to be said. Far too many people want to be successful coaches, but they don’t want to do what it takes to have a successful coaching business.

Don’t get me wrong. Being a good coach doesn’t necessarily mean you need to be good at business. You might be coaching in your job, coaching for a firm, or running a hobby coaching practice that doesn’t pay the bills.

But when you’re ready to become an A-list coach with a successful coaching business and the prosperity that comes along with it, it’s time to get serious about what it really takes.

In my experience, it all comes down to what I call The 4 M’s — Messaging, Methodology, Marketing, Management. (And you have to nail all four!)

1. Messaging
Every A-List Coach Has This Nailed by Laura Berman FortgangWhen you don’t have clear messaging, your audience has no idea what to do with you. If you’re confused, they’re confused. Your messaging needs to be straightforward and get right to the point.
For example, my message for my coach audience is simple: “I help coaches differentiate themselves in the marketplace and prosper.” What’s yours?

2. Methodology
Your potential clients should also know HOW you get the job done. What’s your approach for getting results? You need to have your own way of doing what you do that sets you apart from the next coach.

3. Marketing
You must get the word out so people know about your products and services. You don’t have to be a dancing polar bear on TikTok; you simply need to get your clear messaging and methodology out there in front of the right folks through speaking, teaching, writing, etc.
No need to stretch yourself thin or be inauthentic. Lean into your strengths.

4. Management
A successful coaching business requires effective management. You need to manage your business — operations, tools, support, and resources. And you need to manage yourself — handle your personal growth by taking on each “new level, new devil” challenge with grace and confidence.

If you’re trying to build a coaching business without nailing the 4 M’s, you’re making it a whole lot harder for yourself than necessary. I’m just going to say it: without the 4 M’s, you won’t make the A-list.

Do This When You’re In a Rut

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We’ve all had those days when things aren’t going so hot. Sometimes it drags on for weeks, months, or (dread the thought!) even longer.

You find yourself in a rut, and it sucks.

You didn’t win the deal or get the promotion. Your last couple of launches all but flopped. Or you’re just not excited about getting up another day to do the thing you do.

Life feels crappy, so hiding under a rock seems like a good idea.

Rather than face another potential disappointment, you’re tempted to avoid it all.

You start counting yourself out, and playing small becomes your go-to survival strategy.

Sooner or later, that rut you’re in can start to get pretty darn cozy.

How can you get out?

You have to play bigger and think bigger.

It might not be easy, but there’s no doubt about it .
Thinking small and playing small simply won’t give you the boost you need to climb out of a rut.

Do This When You're In a Rut by Laura Berman FortgangHere’s how:

  1. Take a Stretch Leap
    Try something completely new. It could be entirely unrelated to your career or business, like taking an improv class or training for a half marathon. Or it could be something that furthers your goals, such as submitting to speak at a conference, or asking someone who inspires you to coffee. The idea is to push yourself out of your comfort zone.
  2. Alter Your Environment
    If you usually work from home, go to the library or join a co-working space. If you typically go into the office, take walking meetings around the building outside. A change of scenery can help to shift your mindset and your mood.
  3. Change the Company You Keep
    Is morale low on your team? Make lunch dates with colleagues in another department. Are the business owners you’re associated with often complaining about clients or continuously doing the same old thing year after year? Expand your network. Remember, the people you associate with affect how you view yourself and where you fit in the world.

Getting out of a rut is all about breaking a pattern you’ve fallen into. Doing something different can give you the kick you need to change your trajectory, shift your energy, and get you moving in the right direction.

Before you know it, you’ll be taking bigger, better, and smarter actions. You’ll know how to break out of a rut more quickly the next time you start to feel stuck.

Facing Doubt? Play the “So What?” Game

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If you’re an ambitious person, chances are you’ve run into naysayers.

Some people are quick to shoot down your aspirations, whether it be a business idea, career change, or goal to go after a big promotion.

Sometimes that naysayer might just be you.

Coming up against doubt can be truly frustrating and rain on your brightest visions for the future.

How can you keep shining and striving without letting naysayers dampen your spirit?

I say have it out with them (or you). Call them (or yourself) to the table on it.

Try this simple, but powerful, exercise I call the “So What?” game.

They say: But you’ll lose so much money in the process!

You say: So what?

Them: Don’t you care if you lose money?

You: So what if I lose money?

Them: You’ll deplete your investments; it’ll be terrible!

You: So what?

Them: You’ll be in a bad position.

You: So what?

Eventually…

Them: You’ll die! (or some other catastrophic consequence)

The whole exchange will begin to feel ridiculous. You’ll see how deeply invested they are in “the fact” that you’re going to fail — when, in fact, this is something they can’t predict.

The idea is to disrupt your line of thinking. They can’t possibly know you’re going to fail. Suddenly their naysaying no longer holds the weight it once did. It’s not grounded in anything solid.

It’ll nudge you out of that loop of worrying over the worst-case scenario. You can begin laughing it off by now asking yourself, why not?

Why not give it a try? Why not break out of the mold and do something new? Why not take a risk?

“So what?” becomes “Why not?”

You can always change your thinking by disrupting naysayers, even if that naysayer is you.

You’re Capable But Do You Have The Capacity?

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Do you have the capacity?

I was talking with some of my A-List Program clients recently and the conversation turned deep.

We were discussing the fears that come up when speaking in front of intimidating audiences, the scariness that comes from stepping on stage in rooms filled with impressive, top-level, credentialed professionals who have their act together!

How do we not only confidently step up, but also inspire and motivate the already accomplished folks to step it up even further?

The participants in my A-List Coach program are pretty impressive themselves. They’re all senior coaches who bring in-depth knowledge and noteworthy experience to the table too. It’s why they do what they do!

So, I shouldn’t have been surprised when one woman piped up with a brilliant observation. “That audience has capability,” she said. “But do they have capacity?”

Interesting question, right? What’s the difference?

Your capability is comprised of what you know, your past achievements, and what you’re likely able to accomplish based on your skill set.

While Your capacity, is based on a deeper sense of who you are as a human being. Your openness and effectiveness for connection, compassion, communication, leadership, trust-building, patience, peace, and more.

A lot of us are perfectly capable of accomplishing something we set out to do. We have the skill set. But we may be lacking in our capacity to step up and do what it takes.

Capability growth might come from a training, certification, or gaining specific experience.

But growing your capacity is an inside job; it doesn’t come from checking off certain boxes.

This is a big reason why we get so frustrated when we KNOW we’re capable of doing something but for some reason, we just can’t do it.

If this is something you’re struggling with, here’s what I suggest:

1. Slow down. You’ll want to pay closer attention to yourself and what is going on around you. Become an observer and practice mindfulness.

2. Be kind to yourself. You’re developing your openness to love and self-love.

3. Recognize that reaching the next level requires showing up for yourself and others more powerfully and profoundly.

Leadership is about understanding the human condition. You can’t effectively inspire, motivate, and guide people if you can’t connect with them.

Why You Should Be More Delusional

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When was the last time you got drawn into a good story … that wasn’t real?

Maybe it was the latest thriller on Netflix, or a new release by your favorite author. You found something about the plot compelling enough to pay attention — all because someone crafted a work of fiction that resonated with you. It was convincing!

Unless you’re a novelist or a screenwriter, you might assume you share little in common with the person who drafted the story. But whether you put pen to paper or not, the reality is that you’re writing fiction every day. It’s something we all do.

What kinds of stories are you telling yourself?

I’ll tell you the kind of story I’m prone to spin up: one filled with everything that could possibly go wrong. I’m a worrier. My mind creates outrageous fiction, plotting out vivid imagery of the worst-case scenario.

Sound familiar? It’s one of the most common themes in the stories we tell ourselves: “Danger! Disaster ahead!” And if we find the story believable enough, we tend to heed the warning and stay stuck or proceed with far too much caution.

But worry isn’t a true story. It’s a fiction about a future that hasn’t arrived yet.

A better use of our imaginations would be to weave a story about the best outcome. Put your creative energy behind hope and possibilities.

Not only that, but I want you to take it a step further. While you’re at it, go ahead and create ✨outrageous✨ fiction. Be “delulu” as the kids say these days — delusional, for your own good!

Think about it. What if everything is wonderful and will turn out better than your wildest dreams?

Now try this … it’s an exercise straight out of my book, Now What?: 90 Days to a New Life Direction.

Step 1: Come up with 5 outrageous, fictitious scenarios about how your goal or wish can come to be. Your dream job, dream business, dream bank account balance…

Ex: I’m walking down the hall, and bump into Oprah, and she gives me a million dollars.

Get it? Totally outrageous and over the top.

Step 2: After you’re done, read back over your works of fiction and pick out what you can borrow from it. What’s the fiction trying to tell you? Because there’s SOME truth in there somewhere; you might have to dig for it.

Use what you discover to inform your next steps. Do you need to be more bold? Should you find a way to connect with powerful people? Are you recognizing the value of having a platform?

The idea is to stretch your thinking and turn fictional prompts into doable strategies, and you’ll be surprised by what may happen as a result. People accomplish outrageous things every day that started as nothing more than fiction!

Use your brain for good and find inspiration for taking bigger action.

Own Your Authority and Watch It Change How People See You

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I was working with a client last week, and we ran into a common issue.

She had a presentation coming up, and it was a big deal. She was going to be speaking in front of executives at her company, and there was a lot at stake — including her reputation!

It was time for her to show up, step into the spotlight, and own her authority. There was no doubt that she was the right woman for the job. Her data was flawless, her ideas top-notch, and she had the content nailed.

Her confidence, however, was shaky. She feared one of her senior colleagues would see right through her and call her out on something. She kept thinking, “What if I make a fool of myself?”

I see it all the time. People who are bona fide experts, with a masterful knowledge of a subject, remarkable skills, and a background filled with loads of impressive experience, shy away from owning their expertise.

You might be thinking that projecting too much confidence will put a target on your back, and that people will look for ways to point out your flaws and put you in your place.

You might be second-guessing your authority, wondering if someone else knows better than you and will expose you as a fraud.

I get it. Nobody likes a braggart, and being too cocky can certainly backfire.

Humility has its place. But you can be modest to a fault.

If you want to be taken seriously, you have to be willing to own your authority.

Here’s what I told my client:

  1. To be an expert doesn’t mean you have all the answers. It means you know where to find the answers.
  2. Never wing it. Always be fully prepared, practiced, and polished. You can go off script, but go in with a fully-fleshed out plan for what you’re going to say.
  3. Own the room. This isn’t the time to cower, hide, or make yourself small. Stand up tall and project confidence.
  4. Don’t apologize. If something goes wrong, such as a tech glitch, missing bullet point, or mistake, just roll with it.
  5. Anticipate possible questions and objections. Know ahead of time where people might see holes in your story or take issue with a claim, and be prepared to address these things.
  6. Limit the self-deprecating humor. There’s a time and place for it, keep it to a minimum.

Whether you’re doing a presentation at work, hosting a webinar to market your business, or going to a networking event, owning your authority matters.

You want to be the go-to person?

You want respect and opportunities?

People must see you as an expert, an authority. So it’s time to show up and OWN it!