Now What?® Coaching

from Laura Berman Fortgang

Clarity

Is FEAR on YOUR Menu?

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Big career changes are traditionally served with a side of FEAR. A big, whopping, overflowing dish of terror might be accurate too. Can you do your best thinking and make clear choices while feasting on fear? NO!

In a flight or fight state, pumped up on adrenaline, our actions can be super powered in bursts, but a long inhabiting of the adrenalized state will interfere with memory and learning powers.1

Is FEAR on YOUR Menu?One condition I have for working with a client who is figuring out next career steps is that they cannot be in a rush or panicked about their situation. Years of experience have taught me that although fear is an appropriate response when life hands you a curveball or you’re going through a difficult time, the exploration that will yield the most satisfying choice of work, does not come from extreme emotional conditions.

Effective career and self-exploration just isn’t possible in a flight or fight state.

Sidney worked in the food and beverage industry and was growing increasingly stressed and unhappy with her work. She liked her industry but not the demands of her particular job. She was being proactive by beginning to explore a career change, but her stress was so high that she had no bandwidth to make much progress. As panic grew, the process stopped being effective. It was like asking a person who can’t swim to calm down while she’s drowning.

What do you do if this sounds like you?

Change your order — If instant answers are the only thing that will satisfy your hunger for results, know that they are not likely to be long-lasting or fulfilling. Choose to make a healthy decision instead of jumping into instant satiation.

Dine instead of feast — With the intention of enjoying every course and savoring the experience, you’ll have a very different experience than a feast where the emphasis is on quantity and variety. Take your time. Chew carefully and slowly. If circumstances make it hard to do this, then create two plans: one that will hold you over and one that offers a longer term solution.

Keep temptation at bay — It’s so easy to weaken and let fear tempt you into letting yourself down. Keep fighting to uncover the truest answers that lie deep within you. If logic brings up fear and ceases all action, beware. Pause and decide again if what’s coming from this fearful place is the best choice.

This is a tall order, but it’s do-able. If you need support keeping fear off the menu, let us know. We can help get you ready to make a big change that will be healthy and fulfilling long-term.

1 Matthew Joseph Sharps, Processing Under Pressure: Stress, Memory, and Decision-making in Law

Do You Believe? [Video]

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I promised you the third installment and here it is: Video THREE is about the third block to clarity: BELIEFS

“But I can’t make a change right now.”

We’ve heard it all.

You can’t make a change because of the money, the mortgage, the college, the debt, the _______________. We don’t doubt there’s truth to that, but we also know there’s a way to get past all those obstacles.

Our third and final video walks you through the third block to clarity- beliefs.
Watch to understand how to get to the other side of the blocks and then JOIN Laura for a chance to do the WHOLE Now What?® Program with her guidance at a fraction of the cost of one-on-one coaching.

One lucky participant will also win a private coaching engagement with Laura. Your registration is your entry ticket to answers and to the GRAND PRIZE.

Thank you for taking part in the 10th Anniversary celebration of Now What? 90 Days to a New Life Direction!

Please comment below.

Is It Flying Or Is It Just Me?

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The last few years have felt like they’ve been speeding by and this one is on steroids compared to them. I feel catapulted iFlyingTimesnto outer space by the speed at which time flies. Oddly, the feeling bookends the individual days that seem to have plenty of time in them.

The push and pull, pulse-racing and deep breathing seems to be the ying and yang of recent times and I think it reflects what happens for the clients I work with on their careers. The rhythm of life and business don’t have a steady pace. It ebbs and flows and so does your career search or your ability to move ahead.

Can you harness that or control it? The key is to be ready for it and expect it. Circumstances don’t stay good or bad. Things are always in flux.

The way to deal with it is to create conditions you can control. You can control (or at least plan) a structure within which to work on the changes you want to create. Be consistent in those actions. For example, if you are looking into what you might do next or you are sending out resumes, keep doing the research and wallpapering the internet with your resume no matter what. Repetition is key.

I’ve recently started to step up my exercise regime after a long streak of doing minor amounts of physical activity due mostly to back issues. I hate working out so much it was easy to let the smallest amount of pain keep me from trying. However, the middle-age spare tire has been growing and the lazy streak had to stop. I’ve had to get back up to speed slowly—first taking restorative yoga classes and aerial yoga which is very easy on the body. Finally, it was time to take an intermediate level class. After the first one, I couldn’t walk for five days. Once I could walk, I came back every other day. My level of fitness is increasing. Weight loss will come but consistency is going to be the most important factor. I’m not back to doing a headstand or handstand. I am not back to full flexibility but I know it will come if I keep up consistent action. I know that they gym with weights and cardio will interest me again as I keep feeling better and wanting to build strength further and further.

Here is what I want you to take away from this. Consistent action. We can’t wait to see success. We have to just keep building and stop measuring the results.

Obviously, you are not going to persist if something is not working at all but with steady, consistent work peppered with the occasional burst of high-intensity creativity and action will get results. Just don’t give up. I’m saying that to myself too.

I worked with Scott in the last year on figuring out what he wanted to do with his life. We succeeded at gaining clarity on what his next career move needed to include to gain the satisfaction he was missing. When we parted ways, his job was to keep networking to make his way into a new field. What transpired over consistent action and time (less then four months) was that he was approached by a vendor he worked with through his job to lead their $800 million company. Scott’s story will appear in the updated and revised anniversary edition of Now What? coming out March 2015 so stay tuned for details.

Be consistent. Keep on your career quest. I’ll keep going to the (yoga) mat. Time won’t stand still for us but we will be less at the effect of it if we stay the course.

Performing With Purpose

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by Now What?® Coaching Founder, Laura Berman Fortgang

Why do you do what you do? 

Have you asked yourself that lately?  Does it matter?  If you want to wake up full of energy, ready to tackle your day and excited about    what’s waiting in the office, than yes, it matters.

Knowing why you do what you do and what it is that you uniquely contribute brings great satisfaction, clarity and direction.  It also helps you feel that you are ‘on purpose’. 

Ennui and frustration set in when there is no growth, no challenge and no meaning. Don’t let that happen to you.

The WHY?

Why do what you do?  For yourself?  For your family?  To further a cause or a mission?  To move the world to a better place?  To amass wealth?

The ‘why’ is a great motivator.  You’ve heard the expression ‘keep your eye on the prize’.  The ‘why’ is the prize.

Some people do things to make others proud or to provide or to cause change.  Others do things to appease, please or assuage guilt.  Others still act out of revenge, envy or to prove something. 

Whatever works for you will be fuel for your dreams, you’ll use, but it might be worth erring to the side of the more loving qualities if it’s purpose and meaning you want as the core of why you perform.

The WHO

Completing the picture of performing with purpose is understanding that what you do is not going to make you happy unless you can truly express who you are through it.

Each of us serves a function for the people we come across in our work and in our lives.  Our choice becomes if we want to serve that function in a positive way or in a way that leaves a bad taste in people’s mouths.  In other words, do you leave people better off or worse off after dealing with you over the course of a day? 

Performing with purpose means seeking out opportunities to share that ‘magic dust’ that you exude and making it more and more a part of your daily existence. 

How do you figure out what that is?  Start asking people.  Yes, seriously. Start asking people you trust and what positive effect, if any, you have on them.  See where the answers start sounding the same and you will find critical mass building towards understanding your purpose.

Years ago, I worked with a very successful woman in telecom sales who was not having a very positive effect on the people around her.  When made aware of her impact, she wanted to change.  She wanted to leave people feeling better after being in contact with her. She made it her business to be encouraging and curious about other people.  She continued to be successful in her sales numbers, but she also started being tapped for her marketing ideas.  Within a few months, she made a full change to the marketing function and within a couple of years, her focus on performing with purpose led her to enter training and development and eventually getting trained as a certified coach.  None of these changes were part of any career plan, but rather a plan to live from a sense of purpose.  Her career path took her beyond any one she had dreamed for herself.

She had to figure it out for herself, but you can ask the people in your life and start doing more of what’s working.  Performing with purpose will be satisfying, meaningful, fun and reap surprising rewards. 

So what will it be?  “Magic Dust” or everyday grind?  Your choice.