No role models.
No expectation to even go to college.
A dream beaten out of him.
And yet, this dream did not entirely disappear, and now this man is able to say, “Finally, I am free of this, and I can go after something I’ve always wanted.”
Car mechanic shifts gears, becomes a doctor at age 47 and helps address shortage of black doctors
When making key decisions (like what job is the “right” one for you), it’s great to know that one of our strongest guides lives within us – our intuition.
Rather than taking a bunch of assessments or seeking outside counsel, when we learn to tune in and trust the guidance that comes from our gut feelings, we are far more likely to land on something that really resonates.
It happens . . . things go along well for a couple of decades, and suddenly you find life has happened in unexpected ways, and you’re not sure how to enter a new career path.
Be gentle with yourself as you begin moving forward. Here are some things to consider to support you along the way.
I’m Ashamed of My Work History and Want to Make a Career Change at 40
Sometimes we have an inkling that it’s time to look for a new career, but we don’t quite trust it.
Here are some clues that it might be time to pay attention and take some steps toward exploring “now what?”
When all you can see is what’s right in front of you, it’s very hard to be creative. You may be painfully aware that you can’t stand what you are doing for work right now and still be utterly unable to see any other options. It’s a phenomenon that I see over and over again as I talk to people who can’t find the incentive to stay where they are but have no idea what else they could do.
Sometimes it seems that a career is on a trajectory similar to a laboratory mouse which has to travel straight in a narrow lane from one end of the box to the other. There’s no way to see over the walls of the lane to other possible paths, and all you can see is what is right in front of you. There is no way out and only one way to go – straight forward – on the same path you’ve been traveling.
Of course, this is an incorrect assumption, but it is also a very hard trap to get out of on your own. The key is to understand what choices got you in the box. How did you end up with only one pathway?
It may have been the motivation to please your family or the intent to see a strong suit through. It could have been that you had to prove something to yourself or to others or that you didn’t think you could attain what you truly wanted. There are so many reason we find ourselves cornered by our resume and can’t see any other feasible way to go.
Josh was out of work when he hired me to help him figure out what was next. He detested his old job and knew he didn’t want to go back to the same type of work, but he could not get out of the one-way lane. The salary of his old kind of work was very alluring, but he would admit that the thought of doing the same thing again was mind numbing.
It took a lot of chiseling away at the barrier he had put around the truth of what he wanted. He wanted to tap into his roots as a musician. He knew that becoming a middle-aged rock star held no promise. However, we did eventually uncover many ways to combine his musical interests and business acumen to invent a totally new direction for him that had merit and were worth pursuing. He was able to get some traction exploring different possibilities.
A complete letting go is necessary. I imagine someone holding on to a ledge “white-knuckling” it. They are holding on for dear life and won’t let go. In my fictitious scenario, it’s not holding on in order to avoid falling to great injury or death, but it is with the same tenacity that people will cling to a path even while they admit they can’t stand the thought of continuing on.
Let go. Admit you don’t know what’s next AND stop running in one singular direction. Just stop and wait. Stop ignoring what is nudging you. Listen and trust it even if you’re scared. Stop and wait. You’ll know. And then, you’ll act.
I don’t believe it when people tell me they don’t know what they want to do. I think they do know but they are just too afraid to admit it.
Can we help? Let us know! We have a team of facilitators who’d love to help you find your next direction.
Sure, technical skills matter, but no matter what field you’re in, how you relate with people and the diversity of life experiences you bring into your circle matters.
“…building relationships is important because you just never know where the next opportunity is going to come from.”
One Engineer Explains How Relationships Can Have a Big Impact on Your Career
Our dreams do not always come in the packages we expect.
When obstacles change our course, sometimes simply showing up to be around the passion, doing whatever is needed (even the small and tedious tasks) will reveal new way to be with what you love.
She Believed She Could: Abby DePhillips On Finding Your Path
There are so many colors of truth: White lies, grey areas, lies by omission, exaggerated truth, and complete fabrication.
Which kind of liar are you? Who me?? Yes, you!
Don’t be so shocked. We all lie. We just get so used to it, that we don’t even consider it lying. Telling your kid their drawing is gorgeous, appeasing a boss with a twist of the truth, protecting yourself from pain or conflict—all of life’s scenarios present us with an opportunity to alter the truth as needed.
When it comes to your work and career, the truth is a challenging game. Outside of workplace politics, the truth about our level of satisfaction is often an intricate story we tell ourselves. It’s not always based in truth.
“The money is good. It’s fine.”
“I’m glad to have a job.”
“It’s not my dream job, but it’ll do.”
No harm done, you’d think. However, the truth is hard work. Once you tell it, you have to live up to it or go back to the safety of denial. I help people tell the truth and discover its liberation, and that it’s not as horrifically scary as they fear.
Well, that’s not true. It is horrifically scary, but it’s necessary. It’s essential to getting to the other side of a very brave journey – to arrive in that place where you’ve told the truth, dealt with the fear, taken action anyway and can now live in the new world with a whole new level of satisfaction.
In my twenties, facing the truth that I could no longer withstand the lifestyle required to pursue my theater dreams was one of the hardest truths I’ve had to face. Once the battle with admitting the truth was over, I could move forward. I didn’t have a clue as to what I’d do next, but finally admitting that I wasn’t where I wanted to be and I wasn’t willing to keep slogging, allowed me to be open to new ideas. One of them was to call an old mentor. He had become a coach – I had no idea what a coach was – the rest is history.
What is truth? How can you measure it? It’s often elusive, but telling the truth can clear the way for a greater truth to be told. The line keeps on moving. The truth can be blurry, so who exactly gets to decide what the truth is?
You do.
What’s true about your career or life situation?
Does it feel right?
Does it sit well with you?
Does it give you hope?
If the answers are yes, you’ve made great strides. AND when you take the time to ask these questions, you are measuring your happiness by a different standard. How it feels versus how you think it looks.
The idea that “the truth will set you free” suggests that in the telling, you are opening up the dam of blocked energy and ideas. It means you can stop holding your breath and instead allow the brain and body to be engulfed in the oxygen that will help generate ideas and action. Just as you can’t drive a car with a block in the gas line, you can’t operate smoothly in life with the truth buried deep in your being. It has to come out in order to move your life forward.
Are there consequences to telling the truth? There sure are. I can say with great certainty that even if the ride is bumpy and hard to start, maybe even painful, the work will be worth it. As Robert Frost said: “The only way out is through.” You will get through and things WILL be so much better.
So, if nothing is moving in your career or life the way you want it to, it’s time to tell the truth.
We’ll get it out of you. It won’t hurt as much as that last sentence made it sound like it would. Give us a call.
You hear it all the time, and admittedly you’ve heard it here: “Follow your passion!”
It’s not always the best starting place because you might get stuck, not sure what that means. However, as you explore, develop skills, and find work that brings value, your passion may emerge.
These days it’s very rare to find anyone who stays in a job for life the way our parents did.
If you find yourself in the situation looking for a change, here are some tips to help you get through:
“Fear of failure, of looking silly, of being rejected, of losing status — it’s the single biggest dream killer in the world of work,” but don’t let that stop you from making what could be your best move yet!
