entrepreneurs

How to Make Your 2023 Burnout Free

By Laura Berman Fortgang on December 9, 2022

I don’t have to tell you we’ve all been through a tough few years.

Collectively.

Like me, you’ve probably had some personal things going on individually too. But the shared experience of a global pandemic, political unrest, economic uncertainty, and more is clearly taking its toll on us.

The zeitgeist is groaning about BURNOUT, and the grumble keeps getting louder.

The Great Resignation, the “return to office” push, quiet quitting, and the looming recession (or not?) are all symptoms of and contributors to this aggregate fatigue.

Burnout is on everybody’s mind. If you’re not suffering from it, you know someone who is.

I haven’t been quiet about the fact that it hit me hard in 2022. Even with all of my awareness and tools as a Master Certified Coach, it was rough.

Fortunately, I was able to recognize what was happening and knew exactly what to do. But I learned some valuable new lessons too.

If you find yourself struck with a bout of burnout, here’s what you need to know to cope and hopefully avoid it in the future —

1. You can’t outrun burnout.

Once you’re crispy and toasty around the edges, working harder to overcome it won’t work. You have to accept it and surrender to the idea that some balls are going to be dropped. And that’s okay!

Being in a prolonged state of fight or flight means your nervous system is shot and you’re heading into adrenal fatigue. You have to focus your remaining energy on healing. (Google: “how to heal adrenal fatigue”)

Eating nutritious foods, moving your body, spending time in nature, and meditating can make a tremendous difference in supporting your physical and emotional health.

2. You must ask for support.

Not getting the kind of support you want? Chances are at least some of the people that seem to have abandoned you are having trouble coping too, or they simply don’t know what to do.

Ask for the help you need; be specific. You’ll find that folks often step up … but only when you call on them. Let them know when, where, and how to show up for you.

The calvary may not be coming to your rescue, but you’ll have more help than you had before the ask — enough to take some of the pressure off.

3. Stop overperforming.

All too often, we set unsustainably high expectations for ourselves, and people come to expect us to go above and beyond. But the reality is, we’re overdoing it in ways that are just not necessary.

It’s time to focus on what really makes a difference — in your job, your family, and all aspects of life. Drop the perfectionism and embrace what matters most.

4. Be careful with your media consumption.

When you’ve run out of gas and want to chillax in front of the TV, steer clear of shows that trigger fear or toxic thoughts.

My recommendation these days? The Waltons. Yes, the old 1970s classic that harkens back to Depression-era/WWII-homefront perseverance. Trust me on this! It’s wholesome, progressive, endearing, and just the thing to put your mind at ease and lift your spirits.

I hope you’ll use these tips to ease into 2023 refreshed, recharged, and ready to take on the new year with zeal.

The Often-Overlooked Secret Behind Success

By Laura Berman Fortgang on December 4, 2022

In my line of work, I get to meet a lot of interesting people with interesting stories.

We’re talking about career change and personal growth, so these stories often include tales of facing obstacles, reevaluating priorities, and starting or scaling a business.

I coach folks throughout their journey, so we’re meeting at various stages along the way.

Sometimes they’re working a corporate job with dreams of making a side business their full-time gig.

Sometimes they’ve started a business but hit a plateau because they have too much on their plate and not enough help to get it all done.

And sometimes they’re somewhere in between…

We’re all grappling with various questions and challenges, and that’s okay — as long as we’re willing to ask for guidance, help, and input from those who are a few steps ahead.

No matter what it is, there’s always someone who’s been there, done that, and can make the next leg of your career or business journey easier for you.

A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to sit down with Sadie Prestridge — founder of Prestridge & Co., an Executive Virtual Assistant agency.

An interesting person with an interesting story, I invited her to sit down with me and chat on my weekly Friday Focus. (You can catch me Fridays at 10am eastern on my Linked in Profile, Instagram (@LauraBFortgang) or our Facebook Group HERE)

You won’t want to miss this conversation — Watch in our Facebook Group

If you’re a business owner, feeling overwhelmed by all of your to-do’s — and not even sure what to do day-to-day to grow sustainably — here’s a tip: you have to hire help before you need it. It’s the only way to level up without coming unglued!

This is the often-overlooked secret behind the success stories you hear about.

Sadie shared some fantastic, practical advice that will help you identify, prepare for, and find the kind of support you need.

Only familiar with task-oriented virtual assistants? You might be surprised by what an executive VA can do.

If you’re working a day job, looking to quit, and wondering what it really takes to go out on your own, Sadie also shares the behind-the-scenes scoop on what it took to get her agency off the ground (sans the phony overnight success nonsense we’re all so sick of hearing). I think you’ll find her story inspiring.

Do You Create Roadblocks or Does Someone Else?

By Laura Berman Fortgang on November 6, 2022

When I talk to folks about making their next career move, I’m often met with an imaginary roadblock. At this point, I’ve come to expect it.

This phantom obstacle comes in the form of a prerequisite they’ve conjured up (one that doesn’t actually exist) — an unmet qualification, a missing credential, or insufficient experience.

It’s something they perceive as necessary, and it stops them from moving forward.

But the reality is, they’re usually just counting themselves out. They become their own gatekeeper.

Don’t get me wrong …

Sometimes a job requires a legitimate credential, as it should.

You wouldn’t want to board an airplane with a pilot who hasn’t completed the requisite number of flight hours. And you certainly wouldn’t trust your life to a surgeon who dropped out of medical school.

But for most careers, almost anything goes.

With enough creativity, confidence, and tenacity, you can usually chart your own course … within reason, of course.

Letting a self-imposed prerequisite block your path is self-sabotage.

“They’ll never promote me to director without an MBA.”
“I need a C-suite title before that firm will even consider my resume.”
“Nobody’s going to hire me as a developer without a computer science degree.”

Sound familiar?

Not too long ago, I was working with a client who was eyeing a VP position. She felt up for the challenge but was convinced she needed to reach for a lower rung on the ladder first. I encouraged her to go straight for the executive level role … and she landed it — just like that!

I often work with entrepreneurs who tell me they’re expecting to make about 600k but hoping for a million. I tell them to run the higher numbers, take million-dollar action, and go for it.

It’s like the Norman Vincent Peale quote:
“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”

Even if you don’t reach your stretch goal, you’ll find yourself closer to where you really want to be.

Looking further down the road means seeing past the imaginary obstacles and roadblocks you’ve placed in your own way.

Bottom line: GO BIG!

And if you start second-guessing yourself, check for that slippery slope of self-imposed prerequisites.

Are YOU getting in your own way?

Social Media Brown Out

By Laura Berman Fortgang on August 2, 2022

August 1st ends my month-long social media blackout. I successfully took a full break from creating any content or outreach via social media or email, and it was an energizing exercise! That part of the break was easy. The harder part was staying off social media altogether. So, honestly, it was a brown out.

I purposely took the social media apps off my phone, so access was not immediate. Nonetheless, the addiction ran deep. I cut my screen time by more than half, but I still found myself taking the extra steps to access the apps and take a look. I posted a few stories on my Instagram just because it was fun.

The reason I took a break, which I shared in my last newsletter, was to recover from caregiver burnout. My body was in constant fight or flight mode, and I did find it very helpful to reduce the adrenaline/dopamine hits that checking in constantly can cause.

What I Learned:

Less is More: My Instagram grew more in the month I only posted stories (no reels, no posts) and held followers better than the previous month where we were posting almost daily.
Lost My Ability to Sit Still: Although checking social media on my phone was WAY down, I still did it. It was a constant itch I wanted to scratch, and I’m not happy about that. I regularly meditate and take THAT time, but WOW, was it eye-opening to see how I’m addicted to my phone!
Social Media is Social: Part of checking in on social media when I said I wouldn’t was because I missed people. Social media has become a way to be up-to-date on people I know and care about (at least the part they share publicly). It is a fact of our society that there just aren’t enough hours in our modern life days to call, write, or spend a lot of time checking in with those we care about. For example, my oldest kid is deep into his new career success, and social media lets me know more than a phone call would yield right now.

What I’ll Change:

I’m not putting the apps back on my phone. Making it harder to access is working in checking less often and being more present.
Posting for business can take on a new pace; one that works for me instead of being a slave to the “shoulds” and the algorithms.
I will pay more attention to burnout signs like constant “fight or flight” states and an inability to stay on task. I’ll take more unapologetic and full breaks BEFORE it becomes a crisis.

Like everything I share, I hope this helps you think about your social media consumption, and the load you are carrying during these incredibly challenging times.

Please know you’re not alone. Here is another article that might interest you on coping with burnout.

Are You Sorry? Really?

By Laura Berman Fortgang on May 15, 2022

Here’s a question for you: How many times a day do you find yourself saying, “I’m sorry.” If you took the time to count, I’d wager that many of you are saying those two words more often than you think.

Here’s my take on this – STOP IT!

I’m not saying you should abdicate responsibility when you do something wrong. What I am saying is that if you find yourself apologizing all day, every day, it’s time to evaluate why you do this and put a stop to it.

In my 27 years of coaching, I’ve noticed that this phenomenon is far more common with women. Why do women apologize for things when they didn’t do anything wrong? In many cases it’s because they are highly empathetic. Women often anticipate how others may feel or react and try to preemptively mitigate any damage with an “I’m sorry.”

The reality of life is that not every conversation with friends, family, or co-workers is going to be easy. You will need to have tough conversations to create and live the life you want. It’s so much easier to have these tough conversations when you release the burden of anticipating how others will react to what you are saying. Everyone is responsible for his/her own reactions and emotions. You’re not responsible for how the other person is going to react to the message that you are delivering!

I had an assistant for many years who had a habit of starting off statements with an apology. When she needed my assistance, she would say things like, “I’m sorry. Can I have five minutes of your time?” However, as our relationship progressed, I refused to let her apologize. I worked with her on skipping over the “I’m sorry to interrupt you,” or “I’m sorry, I hate to bother you,” and cut to the chase. There’s nothing wrong with simply saying “I have an issue that needs your attention. Please let me know when you have five minutes today to discuss this.”

Here is a quick and actionable tip you can use if you find yourself struggling with this. Turn that apology into a thank you. Instead of “I’m so sorry, I can’t make that work,” say “Thank you for thinking of me. I’m not going to be able to make that work.” Starting with a “thank you” allows the conversation to stay on equal footing. When you are constantly apologizing, it can make you appear less confident and competent.

Even if you’re late to a meeting, where it is appropriate to apologize for keeping someone waiting, you can say, “Thank you for waiting. I didn’t mean to be rude by being late. I was caught in traffic.”

So the next time “I’m sorry” is at the tip of your tongue, pause to evaluate whether an apology is needed. If not, change it into a thank you, and then go about your day knowing that you’re communicating with confidence.

What situations make you want to apologize?
Please comment and let me know.

Is It Time for Your Own Business?

By Laura Berman Fortgang on January 27, 2022

According to the Census Bureau, more than 4.4 million new businesses were created in the U.S. during 2020 — the highest total on record. For reference, that’s a 24.3% increase from 2019 and 51.0% higher than the 2010-19 average. Half a million new businesses were started in January 2021, alone.*

What does that mean for you if you’re thinking of making the leap? It’ll mean you’re not alone, you’re not crazy and that the time has finally come for you to oversee your own schedule and destiny.

Will it be easy? NO.

But is it possible? YES.

Here are some things to consider if you’re contemplating your corporate exit:

Time

Will you create a side-hustle or leap in full time? It can take one to three years to build a sustainable service business depending on your network and propensity for hustle.

Money

It’s not out of the question to be able to start a service-based business with a few thousand dollars if equipment is not needed, but it’s all about how fast you can get cash coming in.

Figure out if you’ll be funding this yourself and how long you can go without an income as you build. If you are going to try to secure funding from family and friends, make very clear agreement and discuss each other’s expectations.

Here is a general idea of some things to budget for and what to think about.

What are you selling?

Where your original idea can change over time, it’s important to know what you are offering and for how much. How will the marketplace value your service? Does it match what you hope for? Do some informal market research speaking to several people you feel might be potential customers down the road. Find competitors and get a sense of what is working out there.

(Note: If you test this with friend, they will not be a good gauge of your worth in the marketplace. They are not likely to offer up big numbers that they wouldn’t pay themselves but remember others might)

Gaps in strengths and knowledge

You have to be honest with yourself. What is the skill you can’t wait to charge for? The result you can’t wait to create? Then, ask yourself what could get in the way of you being paid to use/create that? Are you afraid to talk to people? Are you unclear about how to market your service or even how to have a sales conversation? Do you have a hurdle to climb when it comes to understanding the technology, you’ll need to be all things as a solopreneur?

It is critical that you do an honest assessment and start upgrading your skills to fill the gaps or identify a partner or help that could be a part of the business to make it succeed.

Your odds

Just like adding kids to your life, or buying a home, you can’t wait for the perfect timing because there is no such thing. However, the trend is here and it’s a favorable time. Remember though, that according to JP Morgan Chase statistics, roughly a third of new businesses exit within their first two years, and half exit within their first five years. The survival rate of new businesses has been remarkably consistent over time.

All that means for you is to do your homework and prepare. Consistency of action, some planning, and a tremendous amount of gumption (fear is a good motivator!) are what will put you over the top.