A couple of weeks ago, an organization notorious for not offering compensation to their speakers asked me to speak. I almost turned them down, but then I remembered something important.
As a business owner, it’s my job to ask for the money. When I don’t ask for what I’m worth, I’m hiding behind assumptions and counting myself out before I’ve even tried.
I decided to show up for myself and ask for my fee – and they paid for it! This is unheard of with these guys, so it made me wonder: How often am I still counting myself out by not showing up, even though I know better?
I see it every day, coaching people who want to accomplish big goals. They wouldn’t be working with me if they weren’t looking to make a change.
But sometimes I look around and don’t see them showing up . . . anywhere near where they said they wanted to be!
We talked about the plan established in our last meeting, looked closely at the stated to-dos, and found they were nowhere to be found. Missing in action.
That networking event she said she’d attend? No show.
The newsletter he promised to send? No go.
The cold calls, the outreach emails, the referral follow-up, the job application, the workout, the difficult conversation — no sign of them anywhere getting any of it done.
Instead, I find them hiding — behind excuses — somewhere we all find ourselves, sometimes way too comfortable, caught up in distractions, responsibilities, and busy work.
When we don’t show up, we subtly (or not so subtly!) abandon ourselves.
As a coach, it’s my job to help you see this. But I can’t show up for you; this is something you have to do for yourself.
Here’s what I recommend when showing up doesn’t come easy.
Trick yourself. Make it bite-sized. Do something. Show up in some small way.
Go to one networking event, and give yourself permission to leave after 10 minutes.
Spend 10 minutes writing a newsletter, and send it to your best friend.
Once you step beyond the excuses, knock off the jitters, and crack the seal on the safety wrap keeping you stuck, you’ll start to see that showing up isn’t so hard. Even when it’s not easy, it is worth it. Every time you feel the cement block on your feet, chip away at it.
Do a little bit, and it will turn into wanting to do a lot more.
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