Job Change

New Balance

By Laura Berman Fortgang on December 3, 2023

The high-level executive keeps telling himself he’ll have time again soon – that it’s just a busy time, and it’ll slow down in the near future. However, he’s been telling himself that for SIX MONTHS!

A slow down just typically doesn’t happen.

How does he find a balance?
How does he reclaim his life?

THAT is something that I’m sure many of you can relate to no matter what your work is, whether in corporate, as a business owner or being a busy parent.

There are only so many hours in a day, and I’ll say again what bears repeating: You can’t manage time. You can only manage yourself.

Ask Yourself a Few Questions:

Who do you want to be?
If you’re suffering now, that’s not who you want to be. Think about how you want to live, and how you want to behave daily (i.e., I want to be a present parent instead of being a distracted one. I want to be a boss that trusts vs. micro-managing).

What has to happen for you to be that person?
Write down a truthful answer whether you can accomplish those changes or not.

How do you betray yourself now?
Take a close look at how you behave differently from what you’d like to have happen. Yes, those are betrayals of yourself!

Take on a Few Tasks:

Examine your rules.
They’re meant to be broken if they cause you to suffer. Sometimes it’s you who puts limits or unreasonable standards in place that throw your work and life out of whack.

Write down what only you can do.
I can bet that there are items on your calendar and your to-do list(s) that could be done by somebody else if you let go of the reins a bit. Examine your calendar and your activities and determine if you truly need to be there or be the one doing them.

Hire!
Take some things off your plate by hiring them out (don’t be stingy with yourself; you can do it!) Corporately, look at it honestly as you budget for next year and see if there is room for a hire, a chief of staff, or a second assistant. Also notice if you don’t trust certain current team members to be able to take on some of the things you shouldn’t be doing if additional training or a change in staffing is required.

Consider:

Some things you can’t change. If you work in a toxic work environment, you may not have the power to change it. You must consider your options.

I was once hired by a large pharmaceutical company to run a work-life balance training for their sales force. I asked to survey the team first to get a sense of what the issues were with work and life integration.

The survey showed me that this company truly did not walk their talk. They wanted to provide a session to improve their teams’ lives, but they didn’t truly, in practice, believe in it. I refused the job after I did the survey and told them why.

They came back a week later and asked me to work with their leadership team on this initiative because it had to come from the top down to change the culture, which I did.

If your company doesn’t really have policies that allow you to have a decent quality of life outside of work, you have to consider leaving.

There will never be a perfect “balance.” It just doesn’t exist. Something will always tilt the pendulum in the opposite direction, but it IS possible to find a new balance – an integration – where you have less stress and are living in a way that makes you like your work. Heck, maybe even love it!

We’re here to help…

The Significance of the WIN

By Laura Berman Fortgang on August 27, 2023

When you’re looking to reinvent your career or start a business, resilience is crucial.

Because sooner or later, the going will get tough. You’ll need to not only stay motivated but also recover quickly and bounce back whenever you encounter difficulties.

One of the best ways to do this is to focus on your wins.

When facing challenge after challenge, it can feel like losing is imminent. Directing your attention toward your triumphs is like a continuous reminder that you’re actually someone who wins — and keeps winning — every day.

So whenever I work with a client, we start our session with a win.

Sometimes it’s something big — secured a dream job interview, landed a new client, booked a speaking gig, nailed a program launch.

But sometimes it’s something seemingly small — updating your resume, sending a newsletter, booking a discovery call, attending a networking event.

But a win is a win!

Even if you have to dig for it and rack your brain, always keep in mind that you’re a winner at something this month, this week, this morning… here’s why —

A win is something you WANT.
It’s INTEGRAL to your well-being.
And it NEGATES problems.

W.I.N.

If you have a challenging goal to tackle, wins can be the boost you need to get you there. Celebrating your victories leads to more favorable results.

A win changes your physiology. Focusing on your wins makes you shift from a stress-oriented mindset to one of possibility, wonder, and what’s next.

Your creativity amplifies, your problem-solving improves, and your confidence flourishes. You’re ready to take on the next step knowing there will be a positive outcome — if not exactly what you’re aiming for, something better than where you are. A win is imminent!

I’ll admit, this is easier said than done.

In fact, it’s been a personal challenge for me over the years. I thought my problems made me interesting, and I used them as comic fodder, part of my personality. But the self-deprecating humor wasn’t serving me.

It wasn’t until I learned to focus on what was right in my life that things began to shift. By focusing on what was right, I started doing more of what was right, and my wins beget more wins.

Success breeds success.

Could this syndrome be what’s holding you back?

By Laura Berman Fortgang on June 18, 2023

I don’t know about you, but I’ve been talking to a lot of folks lately who are finding themselves feeling overwhelmed, overworked, and underappreciated.

Something interesting I’ve noticed is that many of these people seem to share a lot in common.

As we’re talking, I’m hearing the same complaints again and again. There’s definitely a pattern of symptoms here.

I’m not a doctor (and I don’t play one on TV…) but I’ve been quietly diagnosing people with what I like to call Hero Syndrome.

If you’ve been feeling swamped with responsibility, yet undervalued for the work you do or overlooked despite your contributions, keep reading.

See if any of this sounds familiar —

Are you someone who…
…everyone depends on in a pinch?
…people only call when they have a problem?
…has a hard time receiving praise?
…always wants to feel wanted and needed?
…thinks being “indispensable” is job security?
…never seems to be recognized for your hard work?

It might be Hero Syndrome (which is kind of like the opposite of Imposter Syndrome).

Let me give you an example.

One of my clients was working in research and development for a quick service restaurant company — the department that came up with new and innovative products.

She felt like she was doing a great job, but she kept getting overlooked for promotions and had no idea why. So she hired me as her career coach.

It wasn’t long before I discovered her Hero Syndrome.

She volunteered for all the stuff at work that had nothing to do with her job — the company picnic, fire safety representative, you name it. She was pulled in a million different directions and totally hooked on being the go-to team player around the office.

By making sure people had to depend on her, it meant HER needs were being met, and it felt GOOD. But it wasn’t doing a thing for her actual career!

She told me she wanted to be known for coming up with creative and innovative ideas for the company. Instead, she was known for doing a little bit of everything.

So we put a plan in place to clear the deck, and after about six months, she got the promotion she was seeking.

If this sounds like you, the good news is you can turn things around too. Here’s how:
a. Start saying no. Remember NO. is a complete sentence.
b. Begin setting boundaries. Get clear on what you’ll accept and what you won’t, and make sure everyone else is aware of that too.
c. Unhook from the need that keeps getting met by saying yes to everything.

You have to clear the Hero Syndrome up! Only then will you have the time to focus on what you really want to do. This is how you’ll create the space to step into and become known for the thing you want to be known for.

Want to start a business? Ask yourself these questions first.

By Laura Berman Fortgang on May 21, 2023

Clients often come to me looking to make a career change — into a different job, different industry, or different level. Sometimes it’s a little shift, sometimes a big step up, and sometimes a major pivot.

And it’s never easy, but always worth it. Because if you’re feeling uncomfortable and that nagging feeling that you want something more isn’t going away — it’s time to get moving!

But fair warning: the biggest nag of all can get you into trouble if you let it.

I’m talking about the entrepreneurial bug — that pesky voice that’s telling you to go out on your own, hang your shingle, and do your own thing…there’s no shutting that bugger up…

So, if self-employment is calling you, you need to take it seriously. Don’t allow yourself to make the leap into business before giving it the attention it deserves.

Hear it out, push back, and get crystal clear on your plans for success. Skip this step, and you’ll kick yourself later. Trust me on this.

Start by asking yourself some key questions —

What are you selling?
What are your specific services?, and going to charge?
Will you become an LLC or incorporate?
What kind of seed money will you need?
Who are your ideal clients and where will you find them?
Who’s going to hold you accountable and keep you on track?

The reality is, it takes 1-3 years to build a sustainable service business. Most likely, you’ll be chief, cook, and bottle washer for a while. You may even have to do some work for free in the beginning. There’s a lot to take into consideration…

Are you willing to take the risks? Make the sacrifices? Do what it takes?

You can do it, but you’ll want to go into it with eyes wide open.

What are you scrappy and hungry for?

By Laura Berman Fortgang on May 14, 2023

I don’t know about you, but I am “scrappy and hungry, and I’m not throwin’ away my shot…”

If you’re one of the millions of people who enjoyed the hit sensation Hamilton, you may recognize this tune. Consider it our theme song for today.

I believe being scrappy and hungry is one of the under-appreciated keys to success. Sure, we say things like “hard work pays off,” but we tend to look at the people who’ve “made it” as capable, confident, and poised, forgetting they were once just getting started — scrappy, hungry, and willing to take a shot!

Their goals were worth it to them. Going after their dreams was worth the risk of being judged, getting it wrong, and putting in the work.

What about YOU? What are you scrappy and hungry for?

My clients often tell me they want to serve people, make an impact, grow a business, create change in the world, further a cause, make more money…the list goes on. They claim to really want it, but they’re not doing anything about it.

So my question for them and for YOU is this: If not now, WHEN?

Because I’ve asked it so many times, I have a pretty good idea what your answer is: “I don’t know.” And there’s a good chance you’ll follow that up with, “HOW do I know?”

I’ve noticed we humans have a hard time recognizing when we’re ready. There’s no clear-cut way to know for absolute certain, of course, but there are some telltale signs —

- You’re miserable.
- You have an “itch” that keeps nagging at you that something isn’t right.
- You’re daydreaming a lot, scrolling social media, envying folks who are doing what you want to do.

This is the universe, your internal guidance system, or whatever you believe whispering (or shouting!) at you that it’s time to TAKE YOUR SHOT.

But here’s the sign you most likely won’t get: an undeniable sense that you absolutely, without a doubt, feel ready. If you’re waiting for that, you’ll be waiting forever.

You’re going to have doubts. That’s normal. DO. IT. ANYWAY.

Get scrappy, listen to your hungry desire, and give it a real shot. Make your dream a priority.

Want to write a novel? Wake up every morning and write 1,000 words before getting out of bed.

Want to grow an audience on social media? Start posting valuable content every day; learn what they want from you.

Want to build a business? Focus on getting ONE customer or ONE client, and grow from there.

Career Change in the Land of Possibility

By Laura Berman Fortgang on October 30, 2022

I was working with a client recently who had 23 years of experience in the mortgage industry. She didn’t think she could do anything else because her resume said she was a professional lender. This client honestly couldn’t imagine any other possibilities.

I had my work cut out for me, but I knew my methods were proven and that we’d find new paths. Above all, as a coach, you know our job is to stand in the Land of Possibility. We can’t believe the “story” that there are no other options.

That doesn’t mean we are out of touch with reality. I’m always telling my clients I’m not going to lead them off a cliff or ask them to run away with the circus. I am here to help them decide where to invest their time, attention, and energy.

Are they investing in what can’t happen? Or are you investing in what CAN happen? Are you investing in what can’t happen or what can? (for yourself)

Consider this —

People often tell me they can’t land their dream job, change careers, reach for their dream income, or start a business because of their age.

Is there some truth to that? Yeah!

But does it serve you to dwell on it? Does the fact that limits exist mean you should sit at home, doing nothing — investing in the impossibility of your next moves? Of course not.

Limitfull thinking won’t get you anywhere.

When you’re a committed pessimist, you are vying for the worst possible outcome — fully vested in proving yourself right. But what if you’re wrong? Why pursue defeat?

This is why it’s important to make a distinction between what’s possible and what’s probable.

Think about it…

When we first created the U.S. Space program, did we think it was probable that we’d make it to the moon on the first shot? Well, it wasn’t likely. But somebody had to think it was possible, or why bother? And look what happened.

Now consider what you’re telling yourself about your career:
”I’m too old.”
“I don’t have the enough experience.”
“Nobody’s gonna hire me.”
“This’ll never work.”

Does investing in this “impossible” thinking serve you? No.

What does serve you is standing in the Land of Possibility.

With my client — the professional mortgage expert I mentioned earlier — we broke down the blocks she was experiencing, and l got her back in touch with all the things she LIKES to do but had stuffed down as impossibilities.

That list came in handy when she found herself facing big industry shifts and a potential layoff two months later.

Rather than staying stuck in the “impossible,” I challenge you to invest your time, attention, and energy into what’s possible too.

I challenge you to do the work and explore the Land of Possibility with clarity and gusto.