Don’t set any goals?! Is that what I’m recommending? Well, yes. Sort of.
I want to introduce you to a way to get new results in your life that will be FAR MORE effective than simply writing down your SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-bound).
The key to getting more bang from your New Year’s reset is to set WHO goals vs. WHAT goals. WHAT?! Yes, you read correctly. I want you to focus on where you need to grow personally before you focus on WHAT you want to accomplish. For example, many a New Year’s resolution list includes wanting to lose weight. A SMART goal would be to lose 20 lbs. by June 2019. Specific: 20 lbs. Measurable: 20 lbs. Attainable: Yes, that’s not impossible. Relevant: Yes, I want this. Time-Bound: by June 2019.
There is a $70 billion weight loss market in the United States!* That is absurd when you consider that most of those consumers know EXACTLY how to lose weight. I’m sure you do too. Every audience I speak to can tell me: “Eat less; exercise more.” So, why do we have a multi-billion-dollar consumer market for weight loss advice and products? Because few teach you how to change the WHO. They teach you how to change WHAT you are doing but few actually address the internal changes that need to happen to keep you on track to do WHAT the programs offer and advise.
Back to you! Your 2019 will be brighter if you DON’T set WHAT goals right now and instead focus on WHO goals. Who do you need to be this year? How do you need to behave? What quality do you want to put at the forefront and build like a new muscle?
Do you want to get a new job this year? You’ll need to send out resumes, network, contact recruiters and the like, but you’ll have to work on your discipline and your courage first. To make the most progress on those two WHO goals, your best bet is to start small. Overcome a small lack of courage before you go for the big ask. Are you not one to send back improperly cooked food at a restaurant? Start now. Ask for what you want where the risk is low. Then, start building up your courage to contact the people you know you need to talk to, like an old boss or that colleague who works for a competitor. Build the courage muscle, put a date on it and DO it!
Small ways to build discipline might include: no longer setting a snooze button, committing to walk the stairs whenever possible, writing ten minutes a day, cleaning your desk every night before heading home, tackling whatever you’re working on in small doses.
“Aren’t these just distractions keeping me from doing the work of getting what I want?” you might ask. NO. These are the things that when you take the time to practice, will keep you in action doing the WHAT items without getting derailed. If you have a track record of losing steam on your action plan, you need WHO goals to be dealt with before you move into your action plan. Then you keep up the muscle-building while you move into the action items. If you don’t work on your discipline when it comes to eating, sticking to a plan becomes erratic. You get the idea.
Stop that GOAL setting right now and get your head on straight. Work on WHO you need to be first before you attack WHAT you have to do. The results will surprise you.
I’ll be right here applauding. Let us know if you need an assist.
*According to PRNewswire
Take a look!
People would be more compassionate
People would me more forgiving
People would be more thoughtful—giving and showing thanks
People would spend more time in wonder
People would invest in the power of magic and fairy dust
People would share extra hugs and laughter
People would think of those less fortunate
People would make connecting with others a priority
People would consider the transformative power of light in their lives literally and figuratively
—–The world would be kinder
I recognize that the holiday season can also be lonely and sad for many people. Gaining 8 lbs. and shopping into debt might not be a wise monthly practice, either. At the same time, banning politics from family gatherings might be a good year-round pact!
In all seriousness, as busy as this time of year is, it provides a wonderful year end/ new year ritual. To be in a time and place that reflects centuries of traditions, feeling rooted in things that matter, IS available to us every month and every day if we remember to focus there.
That centered feeling where priorities are clear is what I want for you. I, the team at InterCoach, Inc. and the Authorized Facilitators at Now What?® Coaching, wish you all a joyous holiday season and a year of feeling focused and clear on what matters to you.
Happy Holidays and a Focused New Year!
If only we could just Google, “What should I do with my life?” and have the answers magically appear on our screen, laying out for us step by step the path to happiness … wouldn’t that be nice?
But, since that isn’t the way it works, here are some tips to get you going to answer this BIG question that so many people share.