Now What?® Coaching

Category: Reinventing Yourself

  • The Power of the Ask

    The Power of the Ask

    One of the biggest mistakes you can make in your career, business, or life might not be what you think it is.

    Most people never get what they want because they don’t ask.

    I can’t even begin to tell you how often this comes up for me, but I will tell you a quick story that illustrates the power of the ask.

    I often speak at events and conferences, and sometimes I pull a significant speaker’s fee. But, as you may know, professional speakers frequently agree to speak for free because we know how to create money-making opportunities from the stage. Every gig offers a chance to raise your visibility, expand your network, attract more leads, and sell your services.

    But when considering an upcoming conference in Las Vegas, I decided not to risk leaving money on the table. (It is Vegas, after all!) The materials didn’t mention anything about paying speakers, so I took it upon myself to make the ask – for my full speaking fee!

    It turns out that the organizers, in fact, did not have any plans to pay speakers nor did they have a budget set aside to do so.

    But you know what? They agreed to pay me anyway!

    If I hadn’t asked, I wouldn’t be getting my fee, and they wouldn’t have even covered my expenses.

    It’s as simple as that.

    Whether it’s about negotiating your salary, making a sale, gathering the information required to close a deal, or getting the help you need to take your business to the next level, nothing will take you further than the power of the ask.

    The worst someone can say is “No.” But the best move you can make is assuming they will say YES.

    Going into any negotiation, always be prepared to ask for what you want. Go in with confidence and be willing to walk away.

    What do you want? When are you going to ask? Go for it!

  • Life and Career Lessons from the Audition Room

    Life and Career Lessons from the Audition Room

    You may remember my note a few weeks ago about the Power of Joy & how it can serve as a survival tactic in difficult times.

    The headlines are still teeming with uncertainty and a whole lot of “WTF,” so I hope you’ve taken my advice to find pleasure in the things you CAN control, and that you’re doing what you can to create more of it.

    As for me, I’ve been using my time outside of work to do more of what I enjoy by using my favorite hobby as a means to endure, driven by the momentum it creates.

    This isn’t about opting out (or ignoring what’s important) but about opting IN to what helps me show up as the best version of myself, so I can keep fighting the good fight.

    What, exactly, have I been up to? Auditioning for community theater! It’s something I do occasionally, revisiting my past career as a theater professional. It’s been such a joy!

    But you know me. Even in the midst of a good time, I’ll look for the lessons, too, so I can share with you what I’ve learned.

    Here are my takeaways that you can put into practice right away.

    1. Be prepared

    Whether it’s a job interview, podcast appearance, or wedding toast, take the time to prepare thoroughly and well in advance. Practice ahead, gather what you need, and anticipate anything that might go wrong.
    Show up ready and equipped to give it your best shot. Once, my accompanist missed the mark—but I was so prepared, it didn’t throw me off. I knew that song so well, I stayed on track no matter what.

    2. Assume equality

    If you’ve prepared, you can walk in with your shoulders back, knowing you’re just as good as anyone else, as good as you need to be. Allowing yourself to be intimidated never helps. Conveying confidence is key to setting the tone, to being treated with respect, and to creating space for success. (I was an outsider, not from their usual pool of talent, but that was no reason to be intimidated.)

    3. Do your research

    Don’t show up or walk away without the information you need. Gathering details is the best way to avoid misunderstandings, insecurity, or missed opportunities. Ask questions until you’re primed for your next step. (I left knowing what the next steps were and when they’d be letting people know who was cast or not cast).

    4. Be kind

    Never make assumptions about who someone is, where they stand in the pecking order, or how they can help you. Instead, simply go out of your way to be kind, encouraging, and generous to everyone you meet. Anyone could be the person interviewing you, offering an opportunity, or making a decision that affects your future. Rudeness, dismissiveness, and haughty behavior backfire more than you know.

    I’ll keep you posted on whether or not I get the part. But either way, it brought me joy. I hope you’re also experiencing joy, learning, and growing – no matter what else is happening in the world.

  • Is It Really An Opportunity?

    Is It Really An Opportunity?

    If you’re anything like me and many of my clients, your entrepreneurial spirit sees opportunity everywhere. It’s the nature of a go-getter to view the world through an enterprising lens, which sure beats focusing on dead ends.

    But a word of caution: sometimes rose-colored glasses can make you see things that aren’t there.

    We need to be discerning because here’s the thing —

    There’s a difference between opportunity and seduction—a big one! And if you want a meaningful, fulfilling, successful career (and life), knowing how to make that distinction is a must.

    How do you know if something is a real opportunity? Well, it’s not always obvious.

    It might be exciting. It could have you fired up with ideas. And it sounds great…

    But is it a good opportunity? The only way to know is to tune into the clues.

    Let’s consider an example.

    A client recently told me about something that sounded pretty exciting. She had the opportunity to work with someone she admired—a person well-known in the business world who could’ve opened doors for her and put her in the right rooms.

    She lit up with the possibilities—the clients, the connections, the exclusive access to a community…it sounded like everything she wanted and needed to get closer to her goals.

    But the opportunity came with a hefty price tag, which made her hesitate. Something didn’t FEEL right.

    Ultimately, that’s it. That’s the clue: how you FEEL is what matters most.

    Your head looks at the potential benefits, but your gut knows when something is off. Your mind may be seduced, but your intuition kicks in when something isn’t quite right and likely too good to be true.

    A real opportunity might stir up butterflies—questions, insecurities, nervousness.

    But the cautionary gut reaction to seduction will gnaw at you and keep you up at night. (Pro tip: try to sleep on it!)

    She decided to skip this “opportunity” when she recognized it for what it was: a seduction.

    On the tough road ahead, with the prospect of looming economic uncertainty shouting at us daily, we must tune in to our intuition.

    Desperate times can make you more vulnerable to seduction. Always check in with your gut.

  • Are You Multi-Passionate?

    Are You Multi-Passionate?

    If you consider yourself multi-passionate or know someone who does, you’re going to want to read this.

    At face value, “multi-passionate” sounds like a wonderful trait to have. What could be wrong with having lots of passions – many different interests that you consider fun and exciting? The more, the merrier, right?

    Not exactly . . .

    As fun as it sounds to have lots of passions, many of my clients and the people I speak to every day are overwhelmed by their multi-passionate outlook.

    They have a myriad of interests that don’t fit in one neat box and a mixed bag of talent, experience, and abilities that open up a world of opportunities.

    Ahh . . . the possibilities!

    Being multi-passionate means your path isn’t straight or narrow; it’s one filled with options, alternatives, and potential. Sounds great!

    But it also means you can get lost in the twists and turns.

    Here’s what I recommend:

    1. Audit your interests.
      What brings you joy? Where are you most skilled? What’s the required time commitment? What’s the income potential?
    2. Consider the bigger picture.
      What aligns best with your core values? Does this option fit into this season of your life?
    3. Find the congruencies.
      Can you integrate one interest with another? How can you infuse creativity into what you’re already doing? How can you use talents and skills in different ways?
    4. Commit mindfully.
      How will you juggle everything? Do you have the time? Do you need new skills or support to handle things efficiently? How will this impact your bottom line?
    5. Find your pace.
      What’s primary and secondary, and how will you allocate your limited resources? What boundaries do you need to establish?             

    You can thrive in a multi-passionate career and life. I do it and have coached many to do so successfully.

    But if you’re not intentional about it, multi-passions can become nothing but distractions. You can’t allow yourself to get too scattered or spread all over the place.

    Success requires focus – in the moment, on one passion at a time.

  • Joy: A Survival Tactic

    Joy: A Survival Tactic

    You don’t need an update from me about the state of the world.

    We can all agree that there’s a lot going on and much of it is concerning. I almost added, “. . . if you’re paying attention” out of habit, but I can’t tell you the last time I spoke to someone who wasn’t on edge.

    You might not need an update from me, but there’s a good chance you could use an uplift.

    You’re in for a real treat because I have a lifetime of worrying experience! I’m good at overthinking my way straight into worst-case scenarios.

    But you can see I haven’t let it hold me back. The truth is, I’ve relied upon many different coping tactics over the years. However, when things started getting nasty, fear tried to take hold.

    As a coach, I’m surrounded by positive thinkers; it’s a perk of the job. I kept hearing them say, “I’m not going to let this steal my joy.” I understood it intellectually; it just didn’t seem practical. I look for strategies to implement – things I can work on, step-by-step.

    Joy is a feeling, an emotion. It’s something intangible, and I wasn’t convinced I could simply claim it on demand. So I worked on it . . .

    Here’s what I understand now —

    When we don’t have control over what’s going on around us, it’s our natural inclination to look for what we CAN control. It’s how we’re wired as human beings.

    But when we consider what we DO have power over, emotions are at the top of that list. Sure, they can take over briefly, but we’re ultimately in charge from moment to moment.

    We have the power to feel joy in almost any moment.

    Claiming joy doesn’t mean we’re in a constant state of happiness. We can take delight or pleasure in something, even if the feeling is fleeting. Appreciating that instant can be an impetus for survival.

    Think about each moment of joy as a driving force; the motivation that propels you to endure and overcome challenges. Consider joyful moments as momentum.

    What’s one small thing you can do each day to experience joy?

    Writing in a journal, riding a bike, playing with your pet, putting your feet in the grass, taking up a new hobby. It must be something personal to you.

    As for me, I’ve decided to start singing again! I was a musical theater performer for many years, so I’m dusting off the old vocal cords, practicing in the car every day, and going on an audition – simply for the joy of it! (I’m not sure I even want the part. I just want to sing for people!)

    Now it’s your turn. I challenge you to do one thing each day to claim your joy.

    Joy is a survival tactic, and it’s a powerful one!

  • How to Recession-Proof Your Business

    How to Recession-Proof Your Business

    One of the best things about being in business for yourself is that you’re the one in charge. But it’s also one of the hardest things about it. When things get tough, the buck stops with you!

    Well, I’m no economist, but last year’s whispers of a looming recession are turning into shouts lately.

    Some of my clients and colleagues are starting to panic (“I hear ya!”). But let’s not get ahead of ourselves and throw up our hands in defeat. Remember, you’re in charge, which means you have options.

    It’s time to start recession-proofing your business. Here’s what I recommend:

    Diversify your portfolio.

    Just like your financial advisor would tell you to avoid putting all your eggs in one basket, I’m telling you to add some variety to what you offer.

    What can you do to make your services more accessible?
    How can you bring clients in at different price points?
    Where can you add new revenue streams?

    Retain the clients you have.

    Excellent customer service should always be a pressing matter, but now more than ever, do what it takes to keep your current clients happy! Think of creative ways to add loyalty perks for staying on board, such as bonus one-on-one time or retainer discounts for paying ahead. Retaining a client is cheaper and easier than attracting a new one in any economy.

    Enhance your value proposition.

    Make sure prospects know you’re worth the investment. What kinds of returns will they get from working with you? The results you deliver should make the kind of impact they would regret missing out on.

    Keep up with your marketing.

    If you’re looking for things to cut out of the budget, put marketing near the bottom of the list. Staying top of mind should be a top priority. Switch up your messaging to meet the moment if necessary, but don’t you dare go quiet. Stay out there, and stay consistent.

    Upgrade your skills.

    The key is to stay relevant, to stay nimble, and to pivot if you have to. Be smart about it, but focus on how you can best add value right now, and how you can make your business more profitable. Do you need to learn new technology or a new method?

    Streamline your operations.

    What things are nice to have, and what’s a necessity? How can you make your business run more efficiently (truly)? Be mindful and strategic about cutting costs and eliminating time sucks.

    Most importantly, stand in your power! Lean into your strengths and gifts. People may be discerning about where they spend their money, but they need you. Remember that.

    We’ll get through this!